Five and a Half Months
by CastlePhoenix
Summary: Rose has used the Dimension Cannon for one final mission, leaving the Doctor behind in Pete's Universe. Already struggling to adjust to life as a part-human, the Doctor has to face the very real possibility that he might be doing it alone. He's not sure he can. Except he's living with Jackie Tyler, who staunchly believes otherwise. Companion piece to Letting Go.
1. July

**A/N:** This story is a 6-chapter companion piece to **Letting Go**, although it can probably be read on its own as a take on post-Journey's End life for the part human Doctor. It begins following the events recalled by Rose, in Chapter 4 of **Letting Go**. The usual disclaimers apply. I do not own Doctor Who. I hope you enjoy.

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><p><strong>Chapter 1 - July<strong>

The Doctor jerked upright at the sound of the key in the door lock, the wire he'd been soldering with his sonic flaring and zapping him painfully. He bit back a curse, letting the now useless CPU he'd been modifying drop to the floor as he jammed his aggrieved thumb into his mouth, in an attempt to alleviate the stinging pain. He glared in irritation at the door, damning Rose and her abysmal timing. Not only had she walked out on him in the middle of the night – after attempting to bin every single piece of electronic equipment in the house, in a frankly ludicrous fit of rage – but she'd returned moments after he'd managed to salvage the mess she'd made of his laptop.

It was just so typical of her, he thought uncharitably – if a little guilty, as he was still rather unused to the idea that he and Rose were _fighting_. But there really was no other word for it. He'd only been in Pete's bloody universe three days, and already everything had gone to hell.

Three days of uncomfortable silences, confusing emotions, requests for answers, demands for identities, and the impending claustrophobia of _domesticity,_ had left him feeling completely overwhelmed. Something that irritated him beyond belief, because he was fairly certain this whole situation could have been avoided had he simply been given a few moments to adjust to the complexity that was now his existence. Not that he'd ever admit to experiencing such a _human_ feeling.

He'd just about convinced himself that he could probably face Rose without losing it the moment she stepped through the door, when said door opened to reveal _Jacqueline Tyler_.

'What are you doing here?' the Doctor blurted out rudely, staring at Jackie in shock.

Rose's mother was absolutely the last person he wanted to see right now. In fact, he'd even take the angry, hurt, and upset version of Rose he'd encountered last night over Jackie Tyler any day. If she was here, he was at serious risk of physical harm. However, Jackie seemed to have her own agenda for the morning, and for now it didn't seem to include slapping him.

'Why do you think?' she snapped exasperatedly as she hauled several shopping bags into the hallway. 'I'm here to check you haven't burnt the bloody apartment building down. So if you're done with looking like a gormless idiot, help me get these bags into the kitchen!'

The Doctor scowled, making a point to ensure his mouth was firmly closed before stepping forward to help Jackie with her mass of shopping bags. How she'd ever managed to get them all upstairs by herself, he'd never know.

'I'm not a child, Jackie,' he muttered grumpily as he deposited his share of the bags onto the kitchen table. 'I'm perfectly capable of looking after myself. Managed just fine for the past 900 years,' he sniffed indignantly, knowing perfectly well who had sent Jackie round to check up on him.

Jackie put her own bags down much more carefully than he had, seemingly ignoring his childish behaviour. Finally, when she did look up to meet the Doctor's gaze, he was caught off guard by the disappointment he found lurking within the grey eyes.

He'd barely processed the expression though before Jackie returned her attention to her shopping bags, bustling around the kitchen as she unloaded them, all the while talking a mile a minute. The Doctor would have assumed he'd imagined the whole thing if it wasn't for the fact he could tell Jackie's concerned gaze never left him once.

'Rose said she hadn't had the chance to go shopping yet, but honestly – the state of this place!' Jackie chided him. 'I don't know how you two managed before, off on your own in that spaceship of yours. Milk's not even in date,' she declared, withdrawing from the fridge to empty the two out-of-date cartons down the sink.

Seizing his chance, the Doctor closed the fridge door and deliberately positioned himself between Jackie and the household appliance.

'I don't need a babysitter, Jackie.'

Rose's mother had the cheek to misinterpret him.

'I should hope not,' she answered pointedly, batting him away from the fridge so that she could restock it. 'Mind you, you'll be able to get some practice in with Tony,' she continued unperturbed. 'Doesn't have half a mind of his own, that one. Only five, and already he's taking after his sister. Says he wants to travel the stars, like Rose. On second thoughts, I'm not so sure I want you babysitting him. You'd probably take him to Mars, and not even think twice about it!'

'Oi! I'll have you know I'm an excellent babysitter. Won awards and everything. You're talking to Chialobos' "Best Babysitter", three times running.'

Jackie only raised an eyebrow, looking thoroughly unimpressed.

Before he could mount a defence though, she'd already moved on. Picking up the three remaining bags, she pointedly handed them to the Doctor.

'Now,' she continued briskly, as he opened the bags to examine their contents. 'You need to have a shower, and I'm going to organise some breakfast – although it's really closer to lunchtime.'

He'd stopped listening though, his attention captured by the contents of the bags he'd been handed.

One contained a couple of sweatpants and t-shirts, as well as a more traditional set of pyjamas. The second held underwear, mixed in with several pairs of vibrantly coloured socks. He was embarrassed to note that Jackie had selected a range of briefs, boxers, and boxer briefs for him to try. The final bag held an electric razor, accompanied by a range of personal hygiene products, including a toothbrush.

It hit him then that this was what domestics was: sweatpants and toothbrushes.

Was this who he was now? A man who wore boxers and cologne? A regular nine-to-five guy?

He used to save universes.

And yet here he was, felled by the contents of a simple shopping bag.

A gentle touch on his shoulder roused the Doctor before his thoughts could spiral off out of control. He sucked in a deep breath of air, looking up to find Jackie staring at him in concern. She was biting her lip, clearly worried by his reaction.

'We all have to start somewhere, sweetheart,' she murmured softly, rubbing his shoulder.

o0o

He got through the shower easily enough, finding comfort in the steamy environment and the steady pounding of Rose's high-powered shower nozzle as it delivered the perfect temperature hot water. It was enough to lull him into a state of semi-consciousness, reminding him that despite his best efforts to the contrary his body was in dire need of rest. He would have succumbed to the steamy embrace of the shower too, if Jackie hadn't had the good sense to check on him, tapping gently on the bathroom door to remind him that she'd served up breakfast.

Discarding his suit in exchange for the clothes she'd bought over was a little more difficult. In the end though he knew Jackie wouldn't tolerate him appearing before her in the same clothes he'd been wearing since his arrival in this universe, and he had to admit that the suit _was_ in need of a wash. The smell of smoke and death still clung to the clothing. Not to mention his own body was still adjusting to the new human hormones, which meant he was more than a little grateful that Jackie had had the foresight to purchase some men's deodorant for him – not that he'd ever tell her.

The cotton of the sweatpants felt far too flimsy against his legs, and he missed the familiarity of his wool suit pants. Whilst the t-shirt left him feeling exposed, his arms seeming unnaturally pale in contrast to the deep blue colour Jackie had picked out for him. He was so busy rearranging his clothing, as he stepped out of the bathroom, that he didn't immediately notice Jackie. An irritated huff brought him sharply back to reality though, making him jump almost a foot in the air in surprise.

She was standing by the kitchen bench, arms crossed as she surveyed him with a thoroughly disapproving gaze. In front of her she'd lined up ten empty bottles of Pete Tyler's triple-caffeine-shot Vitex drink. Ten bottles the Doctor was quite certain he'd put in the rubbish bin last night. He was suddenly very glad that there was a bench _and_ the living room, currently between him and Jackie Tyler because he had a terrible suspicion that he knew _exactly_ where this was going.

'When did you last sleep?'

It was disconcerting how easily the woman could latch onto a topic the Doctor had no desire to discuss with her.

'Jackie, I can explain –'

'Can you? Because I know for a _fact_ that Rose can't stand Pete's caffeinated drinks.'

The Doctor cursed internally as his half-baked excuse went flying out the window.

'I'm a Time Lord,' he tried instead. 'I don't need as much sleep as you humans.'

Jackie scoffed, rolling her eyes.

'You're part human now, mister, so don't you try that "superior biology" line with me. Now answer the question: when did you last sleep?'

It was abundantly clear where Rose got her stubbornness from.

Recognising defeat, the Doctor took the few steps over to the couch and sank, far too willingly, into its soft embrace. He _was_ tired, and if Jackie was going to give him a dressing down, well he figured he might as well make himself comfortable.

'I haven't slept,' he admitted softly, staring up at the ceiling as he rested his head against the back of the couch.

'You can't just pretend things haven't changed, Doctor.'

Jackie's voice sounded from much closer than he was expecting, causing him to startle badly as he realised she'd managed to catch him unawares.

'Blimey, you're jittery,' she commented, reaching out to squeeze his shoulder comfortingly. 'Mind you, the amount of caffeine you've had in the last few days I'm surprised you're still standing.'

The Doctor gave her a watery smile.

'I used to be able to go weeks without ever needing to sleep,' he murmured sadly. 'Now, I can't even manage three days without resorting to an artificial stimulant.'

Jackie let out a sigh and sat herself down next to him.

'It's hard enough moving universes, Doctor,' she said sagely. 'But don't make it harder than it should be because you're too busy fighting the small changes. You need time to adjust, more so than any of us, and we all understand that. Just promise me you won't make Rose wait too long, Doctor.'

'She told you about our argument,' he realised flatly.

Jackie clipped him lightly over the head.

'Course she did, you plum! I'm her _mother_.'

He stared at her for a moment, before glancing away uncomfortably.

'I'm not sure I'm who Rose wants,' he admitted quietly, voicing the single fear that had been consuming him since the moment he'd arrived in Pete's world.

'And you've asked her that have you?' Jackie enquired dryly, fixing the Doctor with a knowing look.

'She wasn't exactly interested in hearing me out,' he snapped back, irritated by her line of questioning.

'There's no need to get snappy with me, mister! I'm not here to tell you what you should and shouldn't be doing, and I certainly didn't come over here to pick a fight with you. You and Rose have to sort your own problems out, Doctor. That's how relationships work. And the first thing you should understand is that it's not going to be easy. Goodness, Pete and I used to disagree on the silliest of things in those first few months. We used to fight, and we used to say some _awful_ things to each other, all because we kept comparing what we had _now_ with what we _used_ to have. Course, once we realised _that_, we could see how stupid we were being, wasting our second chance.'

Jackie broke off in exasperation as she caught sight of the Doctor's furrowed brow.

'What I'm saying,' she continued earnestly, 'is that we worked out where we stood with each other, Doctor. You and Rose need to do the same. But, you're never going to get anywhere whilst you're so sleep deprived. You need to admit that you're that little bit more human now, and act accordingly. Even if that means you have to sleep eight hours a day like the rest of us. If you can't even admit that to yourself though, well I'm not sure why you're expecting Rose to do the same,' she finished sternly.

'I don't know where to start.'

'Getting some sleep is where you start.'

The Doctor still looked unsure.

'Rose is frustrated,' she relented, 'but she isn't going anywhere, so you just take your time, Doctor. You work out whom you are and what you want from this life, and when you're ready Rose will be waiting for you. We _all_ want what's best for you. Even if that means coming round here every morning to make sure the apartment's still standing.'

The Doctor couldn't help the slight smile that Jackie's joke elicited.

'I'm not going to burn the place down,' he promised sarcastically.

Jackie smiled.

'I know, dear,' she said kindly, and then because it seemed she felt the need to explain her imposition upon him. 'It's what family do though, Doctor. We look out for each other.'

o0o

Jackie had only left the previous day after ensuring he'd had something to eat and gone to bed. When he'd woken, ravenously hungry, to find he'd slept the entire day through, he'd found a tidied flat and a note from her informing him that dinner was in the fridge, and to expect her again in the morning. He'd eaten and gone straight back to bed, her promised return the next morning, forgotten about.

So of course, he'd been rather surprised to find he wasn't the only occupant of the apartment when he'd finally made his way into the kitchen midmorning.

The sight of Jackie Tyler sipping tea at the kitchen bench, looking mildly bored as she flipped through a gossip rag, was enough to startle any man. At least, that was how he was attempting to justify the rather un-manly exclamation of surprise he'd let out upon catching sight of her – a response the Doctor was certain she'd probably never let him live down. Sulking, he'd sat himself down opposite her, and had only brightened up when she'd placed a choc-chip banana muffin in front of him.

It seemed she'd stopped by after dropping Tony off for a play date, but she'd brought more than just choc-chip banana muffins along. A thick, sealed yellow envelope, that he very much did not like the look of, had been placed very deliberately between them on the bench. Munching on the delicious muffin, he regarded the yellow envelope warily, noting that it was just within his reach if he felt so inclined to reach for it.

A name was scribbled on the front of the envelope in thick black marker pen, the handwriting horribly familiar. If he squinted, he could just make out the block lettering: _**DOCTOR**_.

'Rose asked me to drop these round this morning,' Jackie said casually, taking a sip of her tea. 'She finished them off yesterday, and thought they might give you a bit more freedom.'

Hesitantly the Doctor reached out for the thick package, pulling it across the table until it was directly in front of him. For a moment he considered not opening it. He knew what was in the package. How could he not? They'd argued over these very documents right before she'd left, so of course she'd gone and finished them for him. That was so very _Rose_ – stubborn as a mule. She'd told her mother she wanted him to have freedom though, so perhaps it wasn't going to be as bad as he was thinking. Gingerly, he slid a finger under the seal, opened the envelope, and tipped the contents out onto the table.

The passport was the first thing he noticed, the plain burgundy colour jumping out at him. He was surprised she'd trusted him with one. Horrified, the Doctor quashed the uncharitable thought before it could take root. Rose had _never_ attempted to constrain him. Not once. And he knew she wasn't about to start now. Even knowing his partiality towards running from his problems, she'd entrusted him with a passport – although if he _had_ wanted to run from her, lack of an official passport would never have held him back. It was interesting that she'd given him the option though. In fact, he wasn't quite sure what to make of it. Did she want him to leave?

A bunch of other identification cards had fallen out with the passport, including a driver's license, a European healthcare card, several debit cards, an oyster card, and surprisingly a library card to the local branch. All of them were made out in the name of _Doctor John Smith_. Dutifully he skimmed through the collection of official documents that accompanied the identification cards. The pieces of paper cataloguing a life he'd never lived.

The more closely he examined the little details of this fictitious life Rose had constructed for him though, the angrier he became.

'So this is who Rose thinks I am,' he spat bitterly, dropping the papers back onto the bench.

Jackie frowned at his outburst, but for once refrained from commenting. Instead, she watched silently as the Doctor worked himself up into a right proper tiff.

'"John Smith",' he mocked, 'the epitome of a boring, _average_ life. I've never read anything so dull,' he scoffed.

'Hang on,' Jackie interrupted. 'You've got at least two doctorates in that pile, _and_ double first-class honours in your undergraduate degree. That's definitely more than average.'

The Doctor stared at her as though she'd dribbled on her shirt.

'Jackie, any Time Lord worth their robe, could explain and integrate quantum mechanics by the age of eight,' he replied, dead-pan.

'Yes, well here on _Earth_, we only manage that by age _nine_,' she shot back sarcastically.

She gave him a dirty look, before continuing on.

'It may look "primitive" to you, Doctor, but by _our_ standards those qualifications you're so sceptical of make you a genius. And that's exactly what you shamelessly promote yourself as _every_ _single_ _time_ you open that gob of yours!

'Besides, Rose offered to let you do this all yourself. But if I remember correctly, you didn't seem too interested at the time. So I suggest you stop complaining, and start learning. She didn't waste three days creating all this for nothing!'

The Doctor looked thoroughly put out, his ears tinged pink in embarrassment – and Jackie suspected, lingering anger – as he avoided her gaze by re-examining the papers he'd just dismissed.

'It's still a pathetically dull back-story,' he grumbled mutinously.

He was about to tell her exactly how dull the back-story was when a word in one of the papers caught his attention. Hastily he extracted the file from the pile before him, holding it out at arm's length as he squinted at the typed print, scanning the document with astounding rapidity. He missed Jackie's frown as she watched him struggle to read the small print, but before she could question him, he slammed the paper down, fixing her with a furious glare.

'Why do I have an ASBO!?' he exclaimed, his voice shifting up an octave in his outrage.

Infuriatingly, Jackie burst out laughing.

He shot her a thoroughly disgusted look, and impatiently waited for her to stop laughing and to start talking.

'I'm sorry,' she gasped, getting her breathing back under control. 'Rose mentioned that, but I didn't expect you to react like that! Goodness, I'll have to tell her about it when I get home!'

'Yeah thanks, Jackie,' he snapped icily. 'Because Rose _really_ needs more fodder on me at the moment.'

That sobered her, any trace of amusement vanishing instantly to be replaced with that same sad, disappointed look she'd given him yesterday. The Doctor fixed his attention on a spot about a foot to the left of her. The last thing he wanted – _or needed_ – was Jackie Tyler's _pity_.

'Rose may have been a bit upset with you when she filled that document out,' she offered lamely in explanation. 'If it helps, she did say it wasn't entirely intentional. She never meant to make it permanent, but by the time she'd cooled down she realised she'd accidentally saved it into the police records by mistake. She can take it out if you really want, but her and Pete thought it leant some authenticity to your background, even if you've never actually been drunk and disorderly. There are a few library fines and the like as well,' she finished.

The Doctor grumbled in mild indignation although he couldn't really argue with the Tylers' logic. It certainly did lend authenticity, and it wasn't as though Rose hadn't given him _every_ opportunity to create his own history. Plus, he'd hardly been the model citizen back on Gallifrey. What did it matter if this silly human persona of his was a bit more accurate than he would have liked? Remembering the grief he'd caused his tutors at the Academy, the Doctor let out a long-suffering sigh of bemusement.

'I suppose it's only fair,' he acquiesced. 'My tutors at the Academy frequently bemoaned my tendency towards delinquency in my younger days.'

Jackie simply shook her head at him indulgently.

'Well,' she announced promptly, satisfied that he'd accepted the papers. 'I've got a few errands to run, but I'll drop back in on my way to picking Tony up from his play date.'

'That's really not necessary, Jackie –' the Doctor began, before realising he was talking to an empty room.

Rolling his eyes, he collected the pile of documents, and took them over to the couch with him. If Jackie really was coming back in a few hours he might as well use his time efficiently. Kicking his feet up onto the coffee table he examined the first sheet of his background history. It was time to find out who John Smith was.

o0o

Jackie returned loaded down with shopping bags. In hindsight, the Doctor wasn't sure why he'd expected anything else. Relieving her of her cargo at the door, he dutifully followed her into the kitchen all the while wondering what she'd brought around this time. He wouldn't say no to more bananas, but even he could tell the fruit bowl had exceeded its capacity. He was about to calculate the exact number of bananas that he'd need to consume to keep the fruit bowl below capacity level, when a shopping bag was thrust towards him.

Clearly, Jackie had other priorities.

Warily, the Doctor accepted the proffered bag, and risked glancing inside. He was baffled to find his blue suit.

'Why is my suit in your shopping bag?'

His voice was strained as he awaited her answer. The possibility that his suit – that the _contents_ of his _suit's_ _pockets_ – had been anywhere other than crumpled up on the bathroom floor since yesterday, terrified him. Jackie couldn't possibly have been stupid enough to have taken his suit, he thought desperately. Although the way she was looking at him, as though _he'd_ asked a particularly strange question, did not instil him with confidence.

'Well I was hardly going to _wear_ it down to the dry cleaners, was I?'

'You took it to the dry cleaners?' the Doctor asked weakly, barely able to believe what he was hearing.

'That _is_ how you clean suits, Doctor,' she replied slowly.

At some point his hands had found their way into his hair, and he'd begun to pace.

'Alright, stop!' Jackie commanded, her tone bringing the Doctor up short. 'What's got you all worked up? Because from the way you're acting I'm starting to think the world must be ending.'

Incredibly, he managed to hold back his sharp retort, opting instead to simply gape at her. He couldn't even appreciate her attempt at humour because the way he saw it, the world quite possibly _had_ just ended. Well, _his _world at any rate. Tiredly, he ran a hand down his face, the fight going out of him as he realised that the damage had already been well and truly done. What he needed to do now, was attempt to salvage the situation.

'Where did you take it?'

'The place down on Campton Street,' Jackie answered confusedly. 'It's where I take all Pete's suits. They're always very good, Doctor. Managed to get a red wine stain out of one of Pete's white jackets last year, and yours looks good as new as well, s'far as I could tell.'

'It's not about the cleaning, Jackie,' the Doctor stressed. 'I don't care how good they are at getting wine stains out. I just care about what was in my _pockets_.'

Something clicked in her expression, sudden understanding as she realised what he was getting at. Although why that required an exasperated eye roll, the Doctor wasn't sure.

'Why didn't you say so, you daft idiot,' she chastised, pushing past him to fetch a box from Rose's room.

It was a large box, and clearly quite heavy judging from the way Jackie was handling it. He moved forward eagerly to take it from her, hoping against hope that it contained what he thought it did. The moment he had it in hand he put it straight down on the ground, and began to rifle through it. He'd never been so happy to see the contents of his pockets before, but it was only once he had the TARDIS coral piece safely in hand that he felt he could relax. Grinning like a loon, he looked up to meet Jackie's irritated, but indulgent, expression.

'What do you take me for anyway?' she asked pointedly. 'S'if I'd have subjected those poor people to going through _your_ pockets. Bad enough I had to do it. The number of half eaten products you had in there...'

She suppressed a shudder, moving back into the kitchen, and leaving the Doctor alone to fawn over the myriad of objects that represented the entirety of his worldly goods.

o0o

It seemed three days was all it had taken for him to grow accustomed to finding Jackie Tyler situated in his kitchen when he awoke. Well, to at least _assume_ that the kitchen was going to be occupied before he entered it. He still wasn't quite used to the Jackie Tyler part of this particular equation.

As per usual she was flicking through a magazine as she sipped away at her morning cup of tea when he finally made it into the kitchen mid-morning, dressed again in a clean pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. A combination that was fast becoming his "house wear", he was mildly disgusted to note. However, Jackie would stand for nothing less than at least one change of clothing per day, and since it was far too early in the day to antagonise her he instead opted to oblige her peculiar idiosyncrasies.

What was unusual this morning was that Jackie relinquished the magazine the moment he walked into the kitchen in favour of setting about making his tea for him.

The Doctor was immediately suspicious. Jackie Tyler never fussed over his tea, unless he had something she needed. He stared at her apprehensively as she placed his perfectly prepared tea before him. She knew how well he liked her tea – he suspected his appreciation stemmed from his early encounter with her brew during this particular regeneration – and he tried admirably to resist the temptation of taking a sip. He knew she'd pounce on him the moment he relented, taking his enjoyment of her tea as payment for a favour.

He lasted a respectable forty seconds before giving in and taking a sip. The delightful brew had barely graced his palate before, as expected, Jackie broke her silence.

'Rose is going into Torchwood this morning,' she began casually, testing the waters.

The Doctor carefully set his cup down, his movements precise as he attempted to hide his anger. He suspected he knew exactly where this conversation was going.

'Rose goes into Torchwood every morning, Jackie,' he replied evenly. 'What exactly is so special about today, that you've decided I need to know about it?'

'She's disassembling the Dimension Cannon today.'

There was a brief, uncomfortable silence as the Doctor processed her words.

'Good for her,' he replied bitterly. 'Though I have no idea why that should be any concern of mine.'

'She wanted to know if you'd come with her.'

'No.'

His rebuff was instantaneous, and absolute.

'She only wants your support, Doctor,' Jackie snapped, irritation slipping into her tone at his reluctance to even consider the issue. 'Is it really too much to ask you to help her with this one thing!?'

He gazed at her coldly, his tea entirely forgotten.

'Rose knows perfectly well that I have absolutely no desire to ever associate myself with Torchwood.'

He could tell Jackie was furious as she picked up her magazine, and shoved it roughly into her hand bag before shouldering the ridiculous monstrosity she favoured. She made it all the way to the door before retaliating.

'She only asked because she spent three years building the bloody thing so that she could find her way back to you. Believe it or not, packing up a project she was so heavily invested in _is_ a bit more challenging than just pulling it all to pieces. Of course, you wouldn't know anything about that, would you? Seeing as _she_ was the one who had to come and find _you_!'

With that parting jab, the door slammed shut, and the Doctor was left to contemplate when he'd managed to become so brilliant at sticking his foot in his mouth.

o0o

He'd known there was something wrong when Pete Tyler turned up the next morning.

The man's face had been grim, his colour almost matching the dreary grey suit he wore. He hadn't said much at all, but it had been enough. After everything that had happened in the past week, it had simply taken the words "Rose" and "gone" to bring the Doctor into Torchwood. If he'd been capable of feeling anything at all, he might have found the whole situation ironic. Instead, he sat alone in Rose's empty office, numb to the world around him as he contemplated his new reality.

Pete had taken him straight to the Dimension Cannon the moment they'd arrived at Torchwood. The technology, which normally would have impressed the Doctor to no end, instead seemed to mock him, and it was with the utmost focus he concentrated simply on analysing the data from the computer. It didn't take him long to reach his conclusions: Rose was gone, and the Cannon was offline.

He'd told Pete as much, which was when he'd been taken through to Rose's office, left alone temporarily whilst pointless arrangements were made by the Torchwood staff. At some point someone had handed him a Styrofoam cup of tea. It lay neglected in his left hand, neither wanted nor remembered.

'Tosh has programmed an alert into the Cannon system so that we'll know the moment Rose's jumper becomes active again.'

Pete's voice startled the Doctor from his thoughts. He'd been so distracted he hadn't noticed the other man re-entering Rose's office, and as it was it took him a few moments to process what had been said to him.

'It doesn't matter,' he answered flatly. 'I already know where she is.'

Pete frowned.

'Why didn't you say so before?'

'Because I wasn't ever sure it had been real,' the Doctor admitted, finally voicing one of the numerous thoughts that had been plaguing him as he sat alone in Rose's abandoned office. He'd known the moment he'd seen the Cannon where she'd gone. There was no other plausible alternative.

'Doctor, you're not making any sense,' Pete replied in frustration, pulling Rose's desk chair over. 'Do you, or do you not, know where Rose is?'

The Doctor really didn't feel like explaining the situation to Pete, but he supposed he owed the man some explanation.

'She's in Las Vegas,' he supplied dully. 'In her home universe,' he clarified, pre-empting Pete's next question. 'It's the year 2008 where she is, and she'll spend five and a half weeks looking after a man named Peter Vincent. She'll save his life, in more ways than she can possibly imagine, and on the 15th April, Rose Tyler will offer him a choice. He'll make a decision that will change their lives irrevocably. The last time he sees her, he begs her to stay with him. She doesn't. Instead, she fades away as though she'd never existed in the first place, and he's left wondering if he imagined the whole thing.'

'How can you possibly know all that?'

'Because_ I_ was Peter Vincent.'

o0o

'You look like you've had the shock of your life, sweetheart.'

The Doctor blinked, broken from his thoughts to find himself face to face with Jackie. He frowned as he took in his surroundings, recognising the familiar facade of the Tyler mansion. On any other day he'd have been concerned to realise he had no idea how he'd come to be here, but not today. Not with Rose gone.

Time seemed to have blurred without his permission, events progressing around him without his knowledge. He remembered providing a condensed explanation of his time in Las Vegas to Rose's father, but very little else. Clearly, Pete had decided to take him home with him.

His silence must have alarmed Jackie, because she pulled him down into an embrace, holding him tightly. For once, he allowed himself to be comforted by the woman, not resisting the rare display of overt affection.

Eventually she pulled back so that she could examine him properly.

'She's had us all worried, disappearing off like that, but you look terrible, Doctor. You're not ill are you?'

'No.'

Jackie wasn't convinced, reaching up to feel his forehead as though worried he had a fever. He pulled away, forcing himself to stand tall again.

'I'm fine, Jackie,' he insisted, although it sounded feeble even to his own ears.

She gave him a long, hard look.

'Are you sure you're alright?'

He could have laughed. How many times had his wonderful companions asked that of him? And how many times had he lied?

He forced himself to smile.

'I'm always alright.'

The lie was almost convincing this time.

'Best get you settled inside then,' Jackie said, letting him win for now.

He was almost at the door when her words registered with him.

'Settled?' he asked confusedly. 'Jackie, I'm not staying.'

She stopped dead, her eyes narrowing dangerously as she turned to face him, arms crossed tightly across her chest and eyebrow half raised already.

'How long did you say she was going to be gone for?'

'Five and a half weeks,' he answered reluctantly.

'And how many people do you know in this universe?'

'Well,' he began, drawing the word out as he stalled for time. 'You...and Pete, of course...and then there's Jake from Torchwood...'

Trailing off, he frowned as he realised he'd exhausted his list of acquaintances. Although he suspected Rose's mother wouldn't appreciate being labelled simply as an "acquaintance". She was gazing at him sympathetically, the expected "I told you so" uncharacteristically withheld. He must truly look a fright, he thought despondently.

'I know you're not one for staying put, but you'll always have a home with us, Doctor.'

To her dying day, Jackie Tyler would never truly understand the impact her words had on him in that moment. He had no planet; no people; no TARDIS; no Rose. He was utterly alone in this universe except for one woman, and her family. Jacqueline Tyler, who understood him well enough to know that even if he pretended otherwise, sometimes he _did_ need someone to care enough to ask. Feeling more than a little overwhelmed, the only reply he was capable of was a nod of acceptance.

Jackie smiled.

'Just until Rose gets back, mind you,' she added tactfully. 'One five year old is more than enough for me!'

Her quip worked, and he couldn't help the small smile that tugged at his lips as he followed her inside.

o0o

Jackie must have conspired to keep Tony busy whilst he settled in because it was a good thirty minutes before the youngest Tyler ventured into the guest room to assess his new housemate. Intent on upgrading the second-hand sonic screwdriver he'd nabbed from the TARDIS, the Doctor didn't immediately register the boy's arrival. Unlike most five year old boys, Tony wasn't loud-mouthed. Instead, Rose's brother elected to quietly observe the strange man who'd taken up residence in his home before making his presence known.

'Are you Rose's boyfriend?'

'What!?'

The Doctor just about fell out of his chair, as he whirled around to find himself face to face with a blonde-haired boy. He recognised the eyes immediately, for it seemed Tony Tyler shared his sister's hazel eyes. The boy had been looking over his shoulder, quietly watching him rebuild the sonic screwdriver, but it seemed curiosity as to his identity had drawn out the polite enquiry from the five-year old.

'Well, are you?' Tony repeated impatiently, frowning speculatively as he eyed the Doctor with interest.

Unable to come up with an appropriate answer, the Doctor settled on the obvious.

'You must be, Tony Tyler. I'm the Doctor.'

Tony grinned as he accepted the Doctor's proffered hand, apparently delighted by the grown up gesture.

'Rose talks about you a lot,' the boy supplied dutifully, as though this settled the matter.

'She does?'

Tony nodded in agreement, leaning around the Doctor to look more closely at the disassembled sonic. Thankfully he had the sense not to touch anything, but just in case the Doctor carefully manoeuvred the more temperamental parts away from Tony. Apparently satisfied with his brief examination, Rose's brother turned to look at him once again.

'If you marry Rose, will you be my brother?'

The Doctor swallowed a nervous laugh, the sound coming out as a strangled noise at the back of his throat. He was going to kill Jackie Tyler.

'Well,' he replied embarrassedly, dragging the word out as he tugged nervously on his ear. 'I suppose..._hypothetically_...if Rose and I were ever to get married...then by the standards of this particular planet...and this particular century...you would be considered my brother-in-law.'

Tony beamed at him.

'I knew it!'

'Did you?' the Doctor replied, weakly.

'Who's your football team?' Tony continued, oblivious to the Doctor's embarrassment.

'Err?'

'You can't marry Rose unless it's Arsenal,' he replied seriously.

The Doctor suppressed a laugh. The boy was being completely earnest despite the ridiculous nature of his request. It'd been so long since he'd spoken with a child, he'd almost forgotten the joy such conversations bought.

'Well, Tony Tyler,' he answered delightedly, crouching down so that he was eye-level with the grave-faced child, 'you're in luck. I happen to be an avid Arsenal fan myself.'

'Yes!' Tony exclaimed happily, throwing his arms tightly around the Doctor's neck in the approximation of a hug. 'They're Rose's team as well.'

As quickly as the hug had begun, Tony was pulling away, the Doctor's hand clasped tightly in his own little one as he insistently pulled the older man upright.

'C'mon, I want to show you my football!'

Unresistingly, the Doctor allowed himself to be led outside into the back garden by the eager five-year old. There was a child-sized goal set up close to the house, but it was the official Arsenal FC signature football that Tony wanted him to see. He'd received the ball from Father Christmas apparently, and the Doctor could tell that it was a treasured possession for although it appeared well-used from six months of use, it was also clear that Tony took good care of his football.

'Do you want to play for a bit?' he asked tentatively, clearly unsure if Rose's friend would want to play with her younger brother. Of course, the boy's hopeful expression meant the Doctor's answer was a given, and he happily took the offered ball, mindful of his companion's shorter legs as he kicked the ball backwards and forwards with Tony.

'Did you know,' the Doctor began enthusiastically as he carefully nudged the ball back towards Tony, 'that I convinced the higher-ups at Arsenal that Wenger was making the right choice to sign Thierry Henry back in 1999. They didn't think Henry was worth the transfer fee. Course, they didn't know that Henry won't be replaced as Arsenal's all-time leading scorer until 2036.'

The Doctor's grin faded as he realised Tony was frowning.

'You said your club was Arsenal!' the boy accused, sounding awfully upset, his football lying forgotten at his feet.

'They _are_,' the Doctor assured. 'I thought you'd like to hear about Henry though,' he finished confusedly.

He was completely astounded that Tony didn't seem to have the slightest bit of interest in hearing about arguably the best Arsenal player of the 21st century.

'Henry plays for Chelsea,' Tony grumbled angrily, kicking the football in disgust. 'I hate Chelsea!'

The Doctor winced as the football-turned-projectile hit him hard in the shin.

'Oww,' he whined, rubbing his bruised leg. 'What was _that_ for!? It's not my fault I'm from another universe. How was I supposed to know Henry played for Chelsea here?'

Tony had the grace to look ashamed.

'Sorry,' the five-year old mumbled, running to fetch the football before handing it over to the Doctor as a peace offering.

Growing up in the Tyler household meant Tony had some understanding of parallel worlds, and thankfully Rose had made a point – quite soon after their arrival, and whilst they'd still been on speaking terms – of bringing him up to speed on what was "five-year old Tony" safe and what wasn't. He wasn't going to risk either Rose's or Jackie's wrath by crossing _that _particular line.

They kicked the ball between them for a few more minutes, the silence stifling as the Doctor realised he'd disappointed his young companion with his lack of contemporary Arsenal knowledge. Determined to make the little boy smile again, he volunteered himself as keeper so that Tony could practice shooting goals. Rose's brother was immediately impressed and within a few minutes was laughing excitedly as the Doctor went to great lengths to make inspiring saves. However, Tony must have had more on his mind than football because it wasn't long before the questions started up again.

'Did you fight with Rose?'

The Doctor froze, caught off guard by the sudden question. The truth slipped out though – hard and cold against the warm summer day's breeze – as he gently rolled the ball back to Tony.

'Yes.'

'Is that why she's gone?'

'I don't know, Tony,' the Doctor answered wearily. And the truth was he really didn't know why Rose was gone. His time as Peter Vincent was hazy at best, something that had always bothered him.

'You've got to say you're sorry,' Tony advised pragmatically. 'That's what Mummy says you do after you fight.'

The Doctor smiled sadly; Tony had such a simple view of the world. Somehow he didn't think "I'm sorry" was going to cut it with Rose this time though.

The ball passed between them in silence for several minutes before Tony spoke once again.

'Is Rose gone forever?'

The football thumped into the back of the net, but neither the Doctor nor Tony paid it any mind. Closing the distance between them the Doctor crouched down in front of the little boy, suddenly aware of exactly how young Rose's brother was as he voiced his terrible fear to the one person he was certain would know the answer.

'Your sister would _never_ leave you without saying goodbye, Tony,' he promised surely. 'She's coming back, okay?'

Tony nodded, his doubts vanishing instantly as he wrapped his arms tightly around the Doctor's neck.

'I'm glad you're here, Doctor,' he whispered.

'So am I, Tony Tyler.'


	2. August

**A/N:** Whoops, took a bit longer than I meant to with this chapter. Got a bit distracted writing a one-shot crossover (Head Above Water). And yes, I did just shamelessly promote that...

Despite the lateness, I hope you enjoy the chapter!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 2 – August<strong>

'So, go on then,' Jackie prompted. 'What happened between you and Rose?'

The Doctor held back a sigh. He'd been expecting the question since he'd moved into the Tyler mansion a week ago. In fact, he was begrudgingly impressed that Jackie had held her curiosity in check for so long. However, he certainly wasn't going to reward her for her uncharacteristic patience. Returning his attention to the morning paper's cryptic crossword he studiously ignored his superfluous breakfast companion.

It was the expert level crossword of course, but they never quite managed to last him more than six minutes of concentrated effort. How "TheCryptologist_"_ could possibly think that the clue "_flipping, flipping short clergyman_" constituted an expert clue, he could not possibly fathom. Idly he wondered if he should take up writing the crossword clues for _The Daily Universal Register_, he'd certainly be much more creative than the ostentatious "Cryptologist" was. Although the novelty of doing the crossword would undoubtedly wear off if he already knew all the answers, he realised. And as easy as he found the clues, he still enjoyed being able to do the crossword in the mornings.

A disgruntled clearing of the throat shook him from his musings.

Accepting the inevitable, he looked up from _The Daily Universal Register_ – he still found it amusing that in this universe John Walter had stuck with the ridiculous moniker rather than changing it to _The Times_ – and met Jackie's unamused gaze.

'Yes?'

She stared at him pointedly.

'You heard me perfectly well the first time,' she grumbled, sipping away at her morning cup of tea. 'Don't you pretend otherwise.'

It wasn't quite half-seven yet so Tony was still upstairs playing in his room, allowing his mother a few more moments of peace before she called him down for breakfast.

'I'm sure you know more about it than I do,' the Doctor sniped irritably.

'What's that supposed to mean?'

'Well, Rose came here,' he pointed out. 'I'm sure she told you all about it.'

He couldn't quite keep the bitterness out of his voice. It was hard enough navigating this new "domestic" territory with Rose, but the thought of having to contend with Jackie as well whilst they sorted out their problems was more than he could deal with.

'Actually, she told me to mind my own business.'

The Doctor was so surprised that his hand slipped, his fountain pen trailing across the page of the paper and ruining the crossword he'd almost finished.

'She did?' he queried, for once not noticing that his voice had entered a very un-manly register.

'All she'd tell me was that you'd had a "disagreement over the electronics", and she'd decided it'd be the best thing for both of you if she came and stayed with me and Pete for a bit.'

'Well, there you have it then,' he answered lamely, his disbelief that Rose _hadn't_ spoken of their argument to Jackie colouring his tone.

Glancing down at his crossword, he was dismayed to realise it was beyond redemption; simply a puddle of blue ink, courtesy of his wayward fountain pen.

'And I'm the Prime Minister of Great Britain.'

'Sorry?' he replied distractedly, barely glancing at Jackie as he balled up the now useless piece of paper, standing up so that he could lob it towards the rubbish bin in the kitchen corner.

'Rose wouldn't have come here simply because of your infernal tinkering,' she continued doggedly. 'You argued about the other you, didn't you?'

The wadded ball of newspaper hit the floor well wide of its mark, the soggy thud like a clap of thunder in the now silent kitchen. Very slowly, the Doctor managed to reseat himself.

'Is it that obvious?' he murmured resignedly.

'You weren't the only ones on that beach, you know. She still loves the man who walked away, doesn't she?'

His silence was all the answer Jackie needed.

'Oh, Doctor,' she sighed kindly. 'You can't expect her to stop loving the other one just because she won't ever see _him_ again. It doesn't work like that.'

He stared at her in dismay.

'But it _does_,' he insisted. 'I'm _him_.'

Jackie frowned, unable to comprehend what he was telling her. He let out a frustrated sigh, for it appeared that he was the only person who truly understood what had happened that day.

'I'm not a duplicate, Jackie,' he said resignedly. 'And it's not like with you and Pete because I'm not a parallel version of the Doctor. I am _literally_ the same man. Pete doesn't have memories of Rose growing up. He doesn't remember her first steps; her first day at school; the bronze in gymnastics or the red bicycle for Christmas. He doesn't have those memories because that was never his life to live. He was never _your_ Pete Tyler.

'But I can tell you exactly how much it hurt when you slapped me for bringing Rose home twelve months late,' he continued. 'I can tell you about the phone call we had when the Earth almost went nuclear. I remember the Satsuma in the pocket of Howard's pyjamas, the taste of the tea that helped me through my regeneration, and the Bazoolium Rose brought home for you the day the ghosts became Cybermen. They're _my_ memories because I'm still the same Doctor you've always known.'

There was a moment's silence.

'Except you're part human and he's not,' Jackie murmured.

The Doctor nodded miserably.

'I'm scared she'll stay with _him_,' he whispered, finally voicing the one fear that had been eating away at him for the past week since Rose had disappeared.

He'd told Jackie and Pete that Rose would be back in five and a half weeks, but the truth was that he couldn't be certain. He remembered being Peter Vincent but the memories were distorted and confusing, more so than the previous time he'd used the Chameleon Arch. He suspected it had something to do with the traumatic way in which Peter's life had ended. The integrated human memories were fragile at the best of times when using the Arch, but the state of Peter Vincent's memories suggested that they'd likely been corrupted by the process of converting his biology from human back to Time Lord.

He was certain though that the Rose who had been there with him in Las Vegas had already defeated the Daleks on the Crucible. No other explanation was possible because the woman who'd met him on that ill-fated street, the night he'd siphoned the excess regeneration energy into his handy spare hand, that Rose Tyler had been seeing him for the first time since they'd been separated. Of that he had no doubt.

The problem was that he remembered Rose fading away after he'd opened the fob watch in Las Vegas, and he had absolutely no idea where she'd gone.

For all he knew she'd simply skipped forwards in time to join his full Time Lord self, the man who still had a TARDIS and the universe at his fingertips. And no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't convince himself that it _wasn't_ possible.

'That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard you say,' Jackie exclaimed, succinctly halting his thoughts mid downward spiral. 'Rose loves _you_, you plonk. Why on Earth would she stay _there_ now that you're _here_?'

'_Because I'm still there!_' he shouted in frustration.

He'd shocked her into silence. Standing abruptly he began to pace, his hands working their way into his hair and pulling every which way.

'Don't you see?' he muttered, sparing Jackie only the briefest of glances as he rambled aloud, all the horrible thoughts he'd had, finally spilling forth. 'She'd still be able to travel the universe if she stays with him. There wouldn't be any question of whether the TARDIS grows or not. He's already got one. They'd never –'

'Stop it!' Jackie interrupted furiously. 'You stop, right this instant.'

He was so surprised he stopped mid-sentence, his mouth hanging open in an almost comical way. Rose's mother was standing also, her gaze livid as she stared him down.

'If you truly think, _for one second_, that Rose travelled with you for all that time because she wanted to see the universe, then you don't know her at all.'

Jackie's scathing tone left no room for argument, but he barely registered the warning.

'But...we've always travelled...' he spluttered confusedly.

Rose's mother stared at him. Her gaze piercing as she studied him seriously. Abruptly, her expression softened.

'You really are completely clueless,' she muttered under her breath, searching out her abandoned cup of tea.

Once she was seated again she returned her attention to him.

'In the beginning it might have been about the travel,' she conceded. 'Rose was always a wanderer at heart, always wanting to travel and explore, and you gave her that opportunity, Doctor. But it stopped being about the travel for her a long time ago. She stayed with you because she loves you. She'll spend the rest of her life with you, Doctor, if you'll let her. Travelling or not travelling. It's always been about _you_.'

'Oh.'

Jackie rolled her eyes at his monosyllabic answer.

'And you can stop thinking that she'll be staying in that other universe, mister,' she continued knowingly. 'If Rose had wanted to go with the other you, she'd have gone with him. Neither you nor I would have been able to stop her. But she's made her choice, Doctor, and she's chosen you. So all I can say is that you'd better have yourself sorted out by the time she gets back. Honestly, the pair of you do my head in,' Jackie finished good-naturedly, draining her cup of tea.

The Doctor watched her rinse her cup out, still processing everything that had passed between them in the last few minutes. Somehow, Jackie had managed to weed out, with astonishing precision, all of the insecurities that had been troubling him since Rose's departure. As he turned his attention to his own neglected cup of tea, he wondered if he'd ever learn to stop underestimating Jacqueline Tyler.

o0o

'Are you squinting?'

Jackie's suspicious enquiry broke his concentration, and the Doctor looked up guilty from the history book he'd been perusing. Although "perusing" hardly seemed the appropriate term; he'd barely managed three pages in the past hour.

'No,' he lied unconvincingly.

In reality, he'd had persistent difficulty with his vision since he'd arrived in Pete's world. At first he'd attributed the blurring to fatigue and too much caffeine. But he'd been sleeping regularly now for the past three weeks, and his eyesight hadn't improved. It was the fine print that gave him the most difficultly, the letters coalescing into a horrible illegible mess if he didn't hold the book at least a foot away from him. However, he could hardly get away with that in front of Jackie. So instead, he'd endured the headaches brought on by forcing himself to squint at the text in an endeavour to hide his poor eyesight.

Apparently, she'd caught him out though. He'd been so engrossed in the text that he hadn't heard her enter the sitting room. She'd clearly had several uninterrupted minutes to observe him and had drawn her own conclusions. He knew it was stupid to keep up the charade now, but he'd stubbornly had his head in the sand for so long regarding his vision that he was hard pressed to admit otherwise. Jackie knowing would make it real, and that meant accepting the changes the Metacrisis had wrought upon him.

It was even more pig-headed of him when he deigned to remember that he had in fact worn glasses before in this regeneration, although the prescription had been negligible at best. Now though, he was facing the reality of needing proper aid to correct his vision.

Something he hadn't quite come to terms with yet, if the lying was anything to go by.

Jackie didn't seem in the least bit convinced by the half-hearted lie though. Instead, she crossed to his side and plucked the thick tome from his hands. He hadn't expected that so he passed the book off without a second thought, watching curiously as she flipped it open to a random page he hadn't read yet before handing it back to him.

'What's that say then?' she asked deliberately, indicating the first paragraph.

He glanced down at the page, already knowing that the book was far too close for him to read from. As expected the paragraph Jackie had indicated was nothing more than a smudge of inky shapes he couldn't hope to decipher correctly. Unwilling to be caught out, he attempted to bring the letters into focus by extending the book to arm's length.

Jackie wasn't fooled.

'Right,' she declared. 'Get changed. We're going to the optometrist.'

o0o

'Stop fiddling with them,' Jackie chided exasperatedly. 'They look fine.'

The Doctor glared half-heartedly at her over his menu, but he did as she'd asked and stopped adjusting his new glasses. They were almost identical to the pair he'd carried as a full Time Lord, except the prescription was much stronger than the non-existent one he'd previously had.

'Now what do you want to order?'

'I don't understand why we had to eat lunch out,' he whined for the sixth time in as many minutes. 'There's plenty of food at home. I could have whipped us up some nachos in, ohhh eight minutes, I should think. Or perhaps cheese on toast, Tony loves that.'

Jackie sighed, dropping her menu rather loudly onto the table as she stared at him.

'We're eating out because you've been moping around the house for the past three weeks,' she explained tersely. 'That's why.'

He frowned.

'I've not been moping.'

Jackie raised an eyebrow, looking thoroughly unimpressed with him as she returned her attention to the menu.

'I haven't,' he declared stubbornly, following suit and picking up his own menu.

After dragging him along to the optometrist and securing him three pairs of prescription glasses – three because she didn't trust him not to lose two – Jackie had made the executive decision that they were stopping for lunch at her favourite restaurant in the middle of town. He had to admit that a small part of him was overwhelmingly relieved to be able to read the menu without difficulty, but he wasn't so sure about the company he was keeping. He'd never been to lunch with a companion's mother before. It was a rather unnerving experience, and one complicated by the fact that Jacqueline Tyler was a minor celebrity in this universe.

'That woman's looking at me,' he groused, glaring at said middle-aged woman sat three tables to their left.

Jackie didn't bother to look up.

'No she's not. You're being paranoid.'

The Doctor scoffed.

'She _just_ took a picture of us, Jackie,' he snapped back sarcastically.

Again Rose's mother seemed unperturbed by the development.

'This is why I didn't want to have lunch with you,' he muttered indignantly. 'Now they're all taking photos of me. At this rate I'm going to be in the paper tomorrow.'

Jackie rolled her eyes.

'Have you decided what you want? I'm going to signal for the waiter.'

Admitting defeat, the Doctor stopped protesting and perused his menu briefly. Dutifully he ordered the fish of the day with a healthy serving of chips on the side, much to Jackie's chagrin. Apparently three-star Michelin restaurants weren't the sort of place where you ordered "chips", but he'd never cared much for society's rules. All he really wanted to do was to go home and disappear into the room that was now his at the Tyler's mansion, where he'd be left to tinker undisturbed.

For the most part he was left alone whenever he sought the solace of the modestly sized bedroom, Jackie perhaps knowing him too well to willingly risk disturbing him whilst he worked. Occasionally Tony would sneak in, but the Doctor was well attuned to the young boy's soft footsteps now and always managed to catch him out before his inquisitive little fingers found their way into trouble. It wasn't that he was actively avoiding the Tyler family – or moping, as Jackie had put it – rather he was working on a Void Activity Detector that would allow him to know the minute Rose returned home. And that required time alone.

Two and a half weeks. That was all he had to get through now.

He'd managed three weeks on his own. Only a bit over a fortnight to go now, and then Rose would be back and everything could go back to normal.

o0o

Jackie ventured into his room a week later, laden down with a pile of boxes that the Doctor was immediately suspicious of. He'd finished off his Void Activity Detector five days ago and had finally returned his attention to upgrading his screwdriver once again, the various components currently lying sprawled across his desk in organised disarray.

'They've finally arrived,' Jackie announced by way of greeting.

Carefully setting the sonic wave emitter down, the Doctor acknowledged his guest.

'What are you doing?' he asked guardedly, frowning as he watched her spread the boxes out across his bed.

She sent him an exasperated look, but her eyes were alight with anticipation.

'Well, come and look,' she babbled excitedly, pulling the lid off the first box. 'Pinstripes are quite unusual in this universe, so it took a while for Mr Thompson to order in the right material for you. He was very nice about it though, he's Pete's tailor,' she added as an aside. 'Said he'd make up a few alternative suits for you as well, in case you wanted to try something a bit more fashionable here. There's only three for now, and they're a bit darker than what you'd normally wear, but I thought you'd like something a bit more familiar than those other trousers and shirts I picked out for you. These will all fit you perfectly because they're the same cut, you see? I had him use your blue suit as a template.'

The Doctor had stopped listening.

He stared at the boxes Jackie had unpacked, fury coursing through his veins as he eyed the pristine suits. It was all simply too much: the glasses, the changes to his biology, fighting with Rose, and the underlying anxiety that he'd gotten it all wrong and she'd not be back in eight days time. Everything had been creeping up on him, but this was finally the straw that broke the camel's back.

He snapped.

Before he could even register what he was doing he'd grasped Jackie by the elbow and manhandled her to the door.

'I _don't_ need your help,' he spat lividly. 'I'm not some pity project for you to play dress ups with. I'm a _Time Lord_,' he thundered.

She opened her mouth to say something, her own temper flaring in response to his, but he didn't give her the chance.

'Show some respect, _human_,' he snarled, slamming the door in her face.

It took him forty seconds to realise he'd made a mistake.

He'd lashed out at the only person who truly knew him in this universe. The one person who'd had his back since he'd arrived. And he'd brought her to tears.

There was no excuse either. No matter how trapped he felt by the domesticity of this new life, he had no right to speak to Jackie that way.

As his anger drained away, his parting insult played over and over again in his mind.

_Show some respect, human._

'Rassilon,' he groaned aloud, slumping slightly against the doorway. 'What have I done!?'

Jackie Tyler didn't cry. Not over him. She had never once allowed him to get the better of her, and she'd certainly never been afraid to let him know when she thought he was in the wrong. The idea that he might have cowed her with his thoughtless words was unthinkable. In fact, it was repugnant.

What sort of person was he to take pleasure in belittling someone who'd simply tried to help him?

Rose had been right to leave, he thought despondently. He'd tried to convince her that he was still the same man, but it was clear now that he was a stranger in his own body. Revulsion overcame him and before he could over think it, he was on his feet following after Jackie.

He needed to apologise.

He found her by the French windows, gazing out at the inclement weather. The slight smudge of her mascara was incongruous with her carefully blank expression, reminding him of exactly how dangerous words could be. He'd been a fool. He opened his mouth to say something, but the words seemed to die in his throat. What could he possibly say to make amends for his gross transgression?

Running away suddenly seemed like a very good idea.

As though she could sense his cowardly thoughts, Jackie spoke.

'You're a lot of things, Doctor, but I never thought you were cruel.'

Her gaze remained fixed on the lawn of the mansion, her wistful tone almost chilling in its sincerity.

Silence stretched between them, becoming uncomfortable until he realised she was waiting for him to say something.

'I made a promise once,' he said slowly. '"Never cowardly or cruel". That's what I promised myself when I took on the name "Doctor". That's who I promised to be.'

The words had come unbidden, escaping without conscious thought, but it was a long moment before he managed to speak his true admission.

'I'm not that man anymore, Jackie.'

She glanced at him then, the tiniest movement of her head so that she could see him out of the corner of her eye. The acknowledgement propelled him onwards.

'_He'd_ never have spoken to you the way I just did. I was ungrateful and cruel, and it was unfair of me to take my anger out on you. I'm so sorry, Jackie,' he finished sincerely. 'For everything.'

She didn't say anything for a long while, and he began to wonder if he should leave her alone when she turned to face him.

'That man was the rudest alien I've ever had the misfortune to meet, _Doctor_,' she said frankly. 'He'd have said all that and plenty more, so don't you think twice on it. You've not changed that much.'

The Doctor gaped.

'But you left...without saying anything...' he stammered. 'I thought...you...'

'I only left because some plonker shut the door in my face,' Jackie chastised, cutting him off. 'Not much use arguing with a wooden door, is there?'

His hands found their way into his hair, ruffling it up as he considered how stupid he'd been.

'I'm sorry,' he repeated, needing Jackie to understand he hadn't meant a word of his tirade.

'I know,' she said gently. 'We all say hurtful things when we're upset and angry, Doctor. It doesn't mean it's not painful to hear them, but the point is you tend to be a bit more forgiving when you understand what's going on in the other person's life.

'You're scared and you're worried, and I pushed you too far today. But don't think for one second that I'm sorry,' she finished warningly, although her amusement was obvious. 'You can't wear that blue suit forever, you know.'

Despite himself, the Doctor smiled.

'When did you get so wise?'

Thankfully Jackie seemed to recognise the sincerity behind his words, sobering as she considered his question seriously.

'Having children changes you, Doctor,' she said simply. 'And having your only child disappear for a year? Well, let's just say that it gives you some perspective on life.'

'I don't think I ever apologised for that,' he admitted shamefacedly. 'All I can say is that I know what it is to lose a child, and I'm so very sorry I ever put you through that, Jackie.'

She nodded silently, words failing her as she pulled him into a hug. After all, the nightmare had ended for her. Her child had come home again.

His children never would.

o0o

Rose hadn't come back.

Exactly five and a half weeks to the day since she'd disappeared, and there was no sign of her. The Void Activity Detector he'd built remained stubbornly silent and the Dimension Cannon room tellingly empty. He'd wanted to be there when she returned, but as the hours stretched out his confidence ebbed away, waning with each second she failed to return.

He'd waited over twenty-eight hours for her, perched on an uncomfortable wheelie office chair in the Dimension Cannon room, when Pete finally insisted on escorting him home in the early hours of the morning. Neither he nor Jackie said anything, but the Doctor could tell that they were both equally worried and upset by Rose's continued absence.

They'd both been so certain that he'd known what he was talking about when he'd told them five and a half weeks.

It was clear he'd been wrong.

He held out hope for another five and a half days before he accepted defeat.

Rose wasn't coming back.

o0o

The sour smell of vomit, laced with the malodorous stench of stale urine assaulted him as he returned to consciousness. His head felt as though it had been split in two, the steady thump of his blood as it circulated through his abused system making him nauseous.

He'd barely registered the sensation before he was dry heaving, rolling onto his side in a pathetic attempt to manoeuvre himself upright. He'd not felt this ill since his seventh regeneration, when he'd unwittingly been given an anaesthetic and subjected to major surgery by well-meaning, yet frankly appalling, human doctors.

Once he was certain he wasn't going to vomit he managed to pull himself upright onto his knees, and for the first time since waking he surveyed his surroundings. For the life of him he couldn't remember what he'd been doing prior to regaining consciousness. In fact, his memory of the entire previous evening was a strange blur of half-remembered sounds and colours that made very little sense. There was one distinctive element to his memories though, and that was the residual taste of alcohol.

He'd definitely had more than one drink then, he thought grimly. And judging by his current location, he'd clearly taken leave of his senses. The Tylers were not going to be happy because he appeared to have woken up in a cell.

The facilities seemed to be relatively new, the room obviously designed for optimum management of drunks. The cell doors were all clear glass, arranged in a circle around a central hub which allowed the officer on duty to keep an eye on his wayward charges. Objectively, the Doctor supposed it reduced the likelihood of a prisoner deteriorating medically whilst in police custody, but he couldn't quite shake the feeling that he was very much like a goldfish in a glass bowl.

The shrill tone of a ringing phone pierced the relative silence of the watch-house, battering his ear drums with startling vindictiveness. He'd forgotten how much he hated being hung-over. Not that he'd ever experienced a hangover quite as debilitating as this one. Apparently the human part of his physiology did not tolerate alcohol well. Wishing the infernal sound would stop, he was beyond relieved when the duty sergeant finally deigned to answer the wretched phone.

'Watch-house. Jackson speaking,' the man answered gruffly.

The guard glanced towards him, and the Doctor immediately began to pay attention.

'Yes, he's awake. I'll book him then. Are you sure, sir? Alright.'

The guard replaced the phone, shooting the Doctor an annoyed look.

'Seems your next-of-kin have arrived,' he groused, leaving his desk to approach the Doctor's cell door.

Entering a four digit key, the sergeant unlocked his cell and waited impatiently for him to step out.

'You should count yourself lucky, Smith,' he muttered darkly, nudging the Doctor towards the desk.

'Sorry?' the Doctor questioned, completely bewildered by the man's attitude.

'I dunno know how much Pete Tyler paid to get you off the hook, but we won't look the other way again,' he warned. 'It's scum like you who've ruined this country. Put another toe out of line, and I'll personally make sure you face your charges.'

The Doctor was so surprised by the man's vehemence that the sergeant's final nudge towards the desk caught him off guard, and he stumbled painfully into the side of the desk. The sharp edge caught him under the ribs with enough force that he knew it was going to bruise up. He didn't complain though, knowing better than to antagonise his jailor further. The man was clearly annoyed that he appeared to be getting off scot-free.

He'd clearly never met Jackie Tyler then.

The Doctor had no doubt that he was in serious trouble with Rose's mother. He remembered consciously making the decision to have a drink. After all, wasn't that what humans did when their worlds shattered around them? Have a few drinks at the pub and forget all their troubles? He'd wanted that oblivion, but he still wasn't sure how he'd managed to get himself arrested. The fact that Pete had clearly gone out on a limb to clear his name for him was not a good sign though, and he suspected Jackie was going to be furious.

'Your belongings,' the sergeant sneered, thrusting a clear plastic bag towards him.

The Doctor just managed to gather it up in time, noting with some relief that it contained the contents of his suit pockets and his trainers. Extracting his shoes from the flotsam and jetsam he'd managed to accumulate in his pockets, he hastily pulled them on, purposefully ignoring his impatient jailor. Letting out a disgruntled sigh, the sergeant herded him to the doorway that seemed to lead into the police station's reception area, and keyed in the code to let him out.

Both Pete and Jackie were waiting for him in reception, the pair of them stony-faced.

Two Torchwood agents stood with them, dressed in their familiar black uniforms of anonymity. The Doctor recognised neither of them. At a nod from Pete the pair of them moved to stand by him, flanking him as they pointedly herded him towards the station's exit. He moved to side-step them, but Pete's voice stopped him short.

'I'd rather you not make a scene, Doctor. You've already attracted enough attention for one day, I should think.'

It was then that he caught sight of the cameras.

Several reporters were milling around outside the entrance to the police station, clearly waiting for him to come out. He scowled in irritation, but realised that Pete was right. Whatever he'd done to attract the attention of the press, there was no point encouraging further interest. Nodding his acquiescence he allowed Pete's Torchwood agents to shepherd him to the blacked out SUV waiting by the kerbside.

The flash of camera bulbs and the click of shutters followed him as he stepped out from the police station. The Torchwood agents did their best to turn the cameras away, but undoubtedly the reporters got the shot they'd come for. Jackie had already made it to the car, and as he was bundled in behind her he heard Pete politely decline to comment on the situation before the man himself slipped into the front seat.

The chauffeur immediately took off, the car absolutely silent as he drove them home.

o0o

'Doctor!'

Tony launched himself at the Doctor the moment he stepped from the car, knocking the wind out of him as he hurried to lift the boy up before he could hurt himself. He'd clearly raced out of the house the moment he'd heard the car on the gravel, escaping out from under the watchful eye of the housekeeper.

'Hello, Tony,' he murmured tiredly, beginning to really feel his hangover.

'You missed story time!' the youngest Tyler accused, looking none too impressed with him as he tightened his grip on the Doctor's shoulders.

Whenever Rose stayed at the mansion she'd always read Tony a story before bedtime. In her absence, Tony had enlisted the Doctor as his big sister's replacement. The little boy had been beyond delighted when he'd discovered that the Doctor was much better at doing the character's voices than Rose. Until last night, he hadn't missed a night, enjoying the ritual almost as much as Tony did.

'I know. I'm very sorry about that, Tony,' he apologised. 'How about we read two stories tonight?'

Tony grinned in delight, hugging him enthusiastically, but he pulled away almost immediately, staring at the Doctor in horror.

'Your face is all scratchy!'

Reaching out a tentative hand Rose's brother frowned as he touched the stubble growing across the Doctor's cheek. Shaving regularly had been another new thing for the Doctor, but it was only as Tony prodded his prickly cheeks that he realised he must look a right sight.

'C'mon Tony, let's have a kick around.'

Pete had come up beside them, extracting his five year old son from the Doctor's grip with ease. Tony didn't seem to sense the frosty atmosphere between the three adults, instead delighted to have his father's sole attention. As the pair disappeared round the side of the house the Doctor realised he was alone with Jackie now.

Clearly Pete was giving them space.

'Right, I expect you'll be needing a paracetamol then?'

'What?' he stammered, staring at Jackie as though she'd grown a second head.

'Well, there's not much point having this conversation while you've got a pounding headache, is there?' she said reasonably.

The Doctor supposed there wasn't.

Meekly he followed after her as she disappeared into the house.

o0o

'You have to stop waiting for her to come home, Doctor.'

Jackie watched him from across the kitchen table where they sat together, each clutching a strong cup of tea. The Doctor had never seen her more serious than she was now, and it was a few moments before he could process what she'd said to him. Once he had, he wondered if he'd misheard her.

'What did you say?'

'You can't keep waiting for Rose to come home,' she repeated.

He frowned.

'But...'

Words failed him, and he simply looked to her helplessly, willing her to explain. He'd followed her inside expecting to be berated over his behaviour the previous evening. Not to be discussing Rose. In fact, he was utterly confused.

'Your whole life can't be about her, Doctor,' she said sadly. 'That's not right.'

'But...I...'

Even now he found it difficult to verbalise the words that bound him to Rose, the phrase that proved Jackie was absolutely wrong.

'I know you do,' she said gently. 'I know you _both_ do. But you can't be there for her if you won't be there for yourself. You have to know who _you_ are without Rose.'

The Doctor laughed aloud, a horrible, empty, pathetic sound that echoed eerily around the kitchen.

'I've already tried that, Jackie,' he said mirthlessly. 'It very nearly drove me mad.

There was a beat of silence.

'Do you want to know why?'

She shook her head but he ignored her, determined to have his say.

'Because I couldn't get over your daughter.'

The silence was deafening, but he forced himself to carry on.

'I've lived for over 900 years,' he murmured. 'I've been a father, and a grandfather. I've travelled throughout time and space, and I've had _so many_ companions. All of them people I've loved and cared for. More than that though, I've seen and done things that you couldn't possibly imagine, Jacqueline Tyler. I destroyed _my own people_ for the sake of the universe. And despite all that, I couldn't stop loving your daughter.'

Even now he still found it difficult to believe, but it was the truth. Rose Tyler had wandered into his life at exactly the right moment, slotting into place as though she was always supposed to have been there. Because she'd found him on the one day he'd allowed himself to be vulnerable.

The one day he'd decided to ask twice.

'I don't know who I am anymore without Rose Tyler,' he finished softly.

Jackie reached out for his hand, giving it a brief squeeze.

'Rose felt exactly the same way when we ended up in this universe,' she said calmly. 'Because the life you lead changes people, Doctor. You show them time and space and you show them their potential. And once that's done they can't look back. Ever.

'You taught Rose to never give up, but then the pair of you were separated. And here she was in this universe, and she didn't know how to live a life without you in it, Doctor. So do you know what she did?'

The question was rhetorical, but still he shook his head.

'She worked out who she was,' Jackie said simply. 'It wasn't easy, and there were a lot of tears and anger along the way, but in the end she made the decision to find a way back to you because it was right _for her_. Not because it was right _for you_. And now it's your turn.

'Don't put your life on hold while you wait for her to come back, Doctor,' she beseeched. 'Trust her, but please don't wait for her.'

He realised then that he _had_ been waiting for Rose, whether consciously or unconsciously he couldn't tell. Jackie was right though, everything about his life since he'd moved to this universe had been about Rose. And that wasn't healthy. Neither was it fair, to either Rose or him. After all, how could he expect her to love him when he'd barely come to terms with this new life of his? It was time he worked out who he was, and what he wanted from this life because he only had the one now.

There were no second chances.

'I'll try,' he promised sincerely.

Jackie smiled in relief, and it was clear she'd been worried about him for some time. As she stood to leave the kitchen, she stopped beside him, a thought seeming to occur to her.

'The other you,' she said seriously. 'Does he still feel all that for Rose?'

Her pity for that other man was almost palpable.

'There's a new man out there now,' he answered softly. 'A _new_ Doctor. And he's me, but not quite.'

He met Jackie's gaze.

'He won't love Rose Tyler as I do,' he promised sincerely.

It was a strange thing to tell Rose's mother, but somehow it bought them both some relief to know that that new man would have a fresh start.

'I'm glad of it,' Jackie admitted softly, reaching out to squeeze his shoulder in a rare gesture of solidarity.

He smiled wistfully. So was he.


	3. September

**Chapter 3 – September**

'Look, Mum! It's the Doctor!'

At the sound of his name the Doctor looked up from his tea, sharing a bemused glance with Jackie. He'd been out all day exploring London and had only arrived back at the Tyler mansion twenty minutes ago. There weren't that many differences between the old London and his new one, but he enjoyed the thrill of noticing and cataloguing the tiny little nuances that did exist.

His frequent day trips to London over the past week had also managed to successfully put all notions of "moping" out of Jackie Tyler's head. He knew Jackie was pleased he'd found his feet in this brave new world of his, but he wondered if she regretted encouraging him to get back out into the world. September had finally arrived and with it Tony's first day of school. Which meant for the first time in several years Jackie had suddenly found herself alone in the expansive Tyler mansion, bereft of even her begrudgingly tolerated not quite son-in-law's company.

So he'd only half-heartedly protested when she'd dragged him into the kitchen for a cuppa the moment he'd crossed the threshold that afternoon.

'Mum? Mum!'

Tony's frustrated voice sounded loudly from the hallway, the young boy apparently rather disgruntled that his mother hadn't appeared the second he'd arrived home.

'In here, darling,' Jackie called out.

Tony burst into the kitchen a moment later, school pack already half off his shoulder and wearing an exceptionally muddy football kit. He spared the Doctor a brief glance before jumping up onto the seat beside his mother.

He was practically bursting at the seams to deliver his news.

'Look at _this_, Mum,' he directed proudly, rummaging around in his backpack. 'Look what Katie gave me!'

The Doctor smirked slightly as he recalled that Tony hadn't seemed anywhere near this enthused when he'd arrived home from his first day of school last week. He wondered what had happened today to result in this unprecedented level of excitement for school. Jackie seemed equally perplexed as she waited patiently for Tony to show her what he'd brought home.

A bedraggled Pete appeared in the kitchen then, holding Tony's football kit bag and looking rather apologetic. He dumped the boy's kit bag by the table and moved to kiss Jackie hello.

'Sorry, we're late,' he mumbled into her ear, as he sat down beside her. 'Tony absolutely refused to shower after practice. Had a right proper tantrum because he wanted to come home and show you this "news" of his. So he's grounded. Honestly, Jacks, I thought he was going to run all the way home by himself if I didn't give in. He's just been an absolute nightmare this afternoon,' Pete finished wearily.

The Doctor smiled wanly, he certainly didn't envy Pete his afternoon in the least. It sounded as though it had been a disaster. Before he could say anything though, Tony recaptured their attention as he succeeded in liberating his prized possession from his homework folder, placing it reverently in front of Jackie.

'See, Mum. It's the Doctor!'

Bizarrely, Tony had pulled out the latest copy of _OK!_ Magazine.

Leaning forward, the Doctor blinked in surprise as he recognised his own face staring back up at him from the garish front cover. He'd been papped outside Canary Wharf, looking distracted as he spoke into his mobile phone and paced the forecourt. He'd been waiting to meet Pete for lunch.

Glancing at the headline, he frowned as he read it. In giant red letters it screamed: _Has Rose Tyler finally settled down? _And below that, in small print at the edge of the picture: _Is this the man who's captured her heart? See page 3._

Pulling the magazine across the table the Doctor flipped it open to examine page three. Several more pap shots of him covered the double spread, most of them from his lunch meeting with Pete. He scanned the article rapidly, his brow furrowing the more he read. The author of the article had clearly let her imagination get the better of her because she'd managed to infer all number of scenarios from the five photos that accompanied her article.

Not least of which was that somehow he'd gotten Rose Tyler pregnant.

Apparently Rose's conspicuous absence from public life over the past two months, combined with a photograph where Pete had been caught frowning at something the Doctor had said over lunch, was strong evidence now "_that the Vitex heiress is likely pregnant"_.

He rolled his eyes, dismissing the article irritably. It was simply another in a long line of ridiculous stories that had sprung up over the last few weeks now that he'd begun to venture out into London. It bothered him that they'd dragged Rose's name into it though. Until now, most of the articles had assumed that he was a Vitex business partner staying with the Tyler family.

That no longer appeared to be the case.

Sighing, he looked up to find himself alone with Pete in the kitchen, Jackie having somehow managed to take Tony off for a bath without him noticing.

Pete eyed the magazine distastefully.

'Tony should have known better than to bring that rubbish home,' he murmured. 'He's grown up in this world of ours so he knows that what's written in the papers isn't always true or nice. He understands how hurtful the articles can be. Heaven knows there have been enough articles about Rose over the years that I wish had never gone to print.'

Pete glanced up, searching out his gaze.

'But you're new, you see, Doctor,' he continued wearily, loosening his tie as he spoke. 'He's never seen your picture in the paper before and he thought the rule was different because it was _you_. Not Rose or Mum or me. He knows better now. And for the record, he's very sorry that he's upset you.'

The Doctor frowned, watching as Pete moved to fetch two wine glasses from the cabinet.

'I'm not upset, Pete.'

Rose's father turned back to face him, pouring out the wine and pushing one towards the Doctor. His raised eyebrow revealed his scepticism.

'Alright,' the Doctor amended, taking a sip of the sweet red wine. 'I suppose I am...' he paused, searching for the correct word to describe his emotions, '..._frustrated_. What right do they have to drag Rose's name though the mud like that? Implying that...that she might be..._pregnant_...and then suggesting she'd have to hide it from you if she was!'

He stumbled over his words, slightly uncomfortable with discussing this particular topic with Pete Tyler. The man simply smiled knowingly though, and the Doctor took another sip of his wine. The earthy flavours lingered on his palate, calming him substantially.

'Sorry,' he mumbled eventually, slightly ashamed by his outburst.

'What for? You're perfectly entitled to feel the way you do. God knows, Jacks and I feel the same way. We're just better at hiding it now. Unfortunately, it _is_ something you'll have to get used to with this family, Doctor.'

His tone was deceptively calm, but the message was clear: _don't expect it to change._

The Doctor gazed at Pete Tyler. It was hard to believe that this was the same man who'd once struggled to accept the possibility of Rose's existence. Yet now he sat before him, her staunchest defender. Pete's fears were unfounded though. He'd made his choice a long time ago.

'I'm not going anywhere, Pete.'

'Good man,' Pete replied lightly, his relief evident. 'Jackie assured me you were here for the long haul, but I had to ask.'

He shrugged embarrassedly.

'You know how it is, Doctor: fathers and daughters, mothers and sons.'

The Doctor smiled wanly. Parenthood wasn't quite the same on Gallifrey as it was on Earth, but he thought he understood what Pete was saying. Regardless of how absent he'd been in his children's lives, he'd still loved them.

'Now,' Pete said briskly, steering the conversation back to safer ground, 'my lawyers will keep an eye on our paparazzi friends. We're a little less tolerant of them over here, so if they cross any lines we'll take an injunction out against them.'

He sighed, sharing a grim smile with Pete. He'd been aware of the public interest surrounding the Tyler family, but it was only now, with his own picture adorning a gossip rag, that he truly began to understand the implications of Rose's minor celebrity status. To be honest, the prospect terrified him a little bit, but it was nice to know that he had the Tyler's on his side.

'It's a pity they managed to get that shot of you though,' the Doctor said jokingly, nudging the magazine back towards Pete. 'You do look awfully like the "disgruntled father-in-law". Did my decision really upset you that much?' he added after a beat, genuinely curious.

They'd had lunch together that day because Pete had wanted to offer him employment at Torchwood.

Pete laughed, shaking his head.

'You can't blame me for trying, Doctor,' he said good-naturedly. 'The way Rose describes it you'd be a phenomenal asset to Torchwood. And like I said, the conditions of your employment would be entirely up to you.'

The Doctor smiled indulgently, taking a final sip of his wine.

His answer wasn't going to change.

o0o

The Doctor stared at his laces, scuffing his worn red Converses against the edge of the footpath. He was sat outside Tony's school, impatiently awaiting the release of the Year One class so that he could walk the youngest Tyler home.

He wasn't entirely sure how this had come about.

At some point between breakfast and leaving to explore the West End for the day, he'd agreed to pick Tony up from school that afternoon. Rassilon only knew what had possessed him to say yes to such an endeavour. Even with his new state of humanity he still struggled with the concept of "domestic". After all, there was a vast difference between playing with Tony in the backyard and being entirely responsible for him for one afternoon.

A concept he wasn't entirely sure he'd grasped.

Jackie had been the one to suggest the ludicrous idea though, so he reasoned she wouldn't really have entrusted Tony to him unless she was absolutely certain that he'd be capable of returning her child home safely. Although after the way she'd turned up her nose at his babysitting credentials, he wasn't sure how his name had even made it onto the weekly pickup roster.

Somehow he doubted he'd ever come to understand the inner workings of Jackie Tyler's mind.

Terrified that he'd be late to pick Tony up, he'd overcompensated spectacularly and arrived a full ninety minutes early. Now he was bored out of his mind as he attempted to resist the urge to take a walk around the block. He knew that if he got up off the courtesy bench he was occupying there was every chance that he'd wander off and miss the pickup time.

And if that happened, he had absolutely no delusions over how Jackie would react.

So he stayed put, listing happy prime numbers idly to himself as he waited for half two to come around. It wasn't long before cars began to appear, lining up in an orderly fashion along the side of the road as mothers and fathers arrived to collect their offspring. Car doors opened and closed as the occupants of said vehicles spilled out onto the footpath, the parents grouping together to discuss children and gossip.

'Is this your first time?'

The Doctor snapped his head up to find a tall, blonde woman stood before him. She was dressed in an expensive looking charcoal grey skirt suit, the car keys to the latest Mercedes-Benz S-Class dangling proudly from her oversized hand bag.

'What?' the Doctor stammered, his thoughts still occupied by happy prime numbers.

The woman raised a solitary eyebrow, not in the least bit troubled by his rudeness.

'Your first time doing the school run,' she elaborated.

It took him a moment to realise what she was talking about but when he did, he grinned delightedly. Talking to this newcomer was much more interesting than reciting happy primes.

'Yep,' he answered enthusiastically, popping the "p". 'How'd you know?'

'You've got that look about you,' she confided. 'The "new Dad" look.'

The Doctor blinked.

'He's not...I'm not...'

He stopped talking abruptly as the woman sat down next to him, her thigh brushing against his own as she invaded his personal space. Her hand came to rest just above his knee, squeezing gently as she continued on as though he hadn't spoken.

'You'll get used to it soon enough. I'm Jane, by the way,' she added, leaning forward to air kiss him. 'Dylan's mum.'

She glanced at him expectantly and he realised she was waiting for him to reciprocate.

'Oh...I'm...John,' he said lamely, attempting a polite smile and failing abysmally. 'Tony's...' he trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck uncomfortably as he struggled to put a name to what he was. Brother-in-law was probably the closest to being an accurate descriptor, but he was hardly going to tell Jane that. He hadn't even asked Rose yet.

Jane seemed satisfied with his answer though and he wondered if she'd once again incorrectly assumed he was Tony's father. He was considering correcting the point when she reached over to finger the lapel of his suit jacket.

'Is this wool?' she gushed. 'It looks _divine_. And this cut is _gorgeous_ on you.'

The Doctor preened. It was the first time he'd worn this suit in public, the brown pinstripes almost identical to the suit he'd favoured in the other universe. Somehow, even though it wasn't the original suit with its transdimensional pockets, the familiar brown left him feeling much more like himself than he had in a long time.

His musings were interrupted as Jane reached across him to fiddle with his tie. The Doctor frowned. She was behaving very strangely, this new acquaintance of his.

'Look, Jane,' he said carefully, subtly putting some space between them as he loosened her grip on his tie. 'Have we met before?'

Her behaviour confused him. He was certain they'd never met before but from the way she'd greeted him he couldn't be certain. Perhaps he'd met her at Torchwood?

'Oh, I think I'd have remembered you if we'd met before, honey,' she promised him.

Her gaze travelled over him suggestively, causing the Doctor to fidget in discomfort. He moved to occupy the final four inches of courtesy bench that remained to him on his left, safely putting himself out of Jane's reach without violating his self instated rule to not wander off.

'Funny you should mention honey,' he babbled nervously, hoping to steer the conversation back into safer territory. 'Did you know that honey is the only food in the universe that contains all of the substances necessary to sustain life? Every enzyme you could ever possibly need mixed in with a delicious cocktail of all the necessary minerals and vitamins to ensure life goes on. And water of course. Can't have life without water, you know? That's what had you lot so excited over Mars a few years back. Bit of frozen ice and the humans think they've got the universe explained. Mind you, _I _could have told you there was life on Mars if you'd –'

His rambling was rather succinctly cut off as Jane lunged towards him, her lips crashing against his own with brutal force.

He was so surprised it took him several seconds to recognise the assault for what it was before he managed to push her away. He was breathing heavily, his thoughts all over the place as he stared in bewilderment at the woman beside him.

'What did you do that for?'

Jane rolled her eyes as she straightened herself up, looking thoroughly put out.

'Oh don't be so naive,' she sneered. 'You were asking for it. Those big sad eyes and that sappy look? You _wanted_ me.'

'What!?' he spluttered.

'Understandable, really,' she continued obliviously. 'You could do so much better than that jumped up tart Rose Tyler. God knows what gutter Pete Tyler dragged her out of, but she certainly doesn't belong with us. The chav wouldn't know a Bentley if it ran her over. It's a wonder –'

'If I were you,' the Doctor interrupted coldly, 'I'd think very, _very_ carefully about whether or not it's worth finishing that sentence.'

His tone left no room for misinterpretation.

'Now,' he instructed calmly, 'you're going to pick up your ridiculous handbag, stand up, and walk to your car. You and I are never going to meet again.'

Jane complied, hastily gathering her belongings to herself before standing to leave. The woman was clearly unnerved, and rightly so. He stopped her once more before she could walk away though.

'One more thing, Jane _Barrow_,' he warned. 'If you _ever_ talk about Rose like that again, you will regret it. Is that understood?'

She flinched as he spoke her full name, undoubtedly unaware that he'd noticed it on the envelope peeking out from her handbag. Nevertheless she nodded, acquiescing to his demands. The Doctor watched her scamper back to her shiny new car, scowling as her revolting description of Rose played over in his mind.

'How come you were talking to Dylan's mum?'

The Doctor startled, turning back to find Tony Tyler stood before him, school bag slung clumsily across one shoulder and his blazer rumpled around his shoulders, as though he'd put it on quickly. He probably had. Smiling amusedly at his rather dishevelled companion, the Doctor straightened up the boy's blazer.

'Oh...you know...adult...stuff,' he hedged, relieving Tony of his school bag and slinging it onto his own shoulder as he stood up. Tony immediately reached for his hand, swinging it between them as he let the Doctor lead the way home.

'Dylan's not very nice,' Tony informed him matter-of-factly as they turned onto Crouch Street.

The Doctor wasn't in the least bit surprised to learn that.

'Neither is his mother,' he muttered under his breath.

o0o

Very few people had the Doctor's mobile number. In fact, he frequently forgot he owned one. It was only at Jackie's request that he'd agreed to carry one, and then only because he picked Tony up from school once a week.

So the fact that it was currently ringing meant he probably ought to pick it up.

Digging deep into the pocket of his blue suit, the Doctor pulled out the vibrating device.

He frowned as he read the caller ID.

'Hello, Jackie.'

'_You could at least pretend not to be disappointed,'_ came the sarcastic reply.

The Doctor rolled his eyes.

'I picked up, didn't I?'

Jackie huffed.

'_Pete wants to know if you can drop by the office as soon as possible –'_

'Why?' he interrupted.

'_Well you're still as rude as ever,'_ Jackie muttered indignantly. '_I was about to tell you why, wasn't I?'_

'Sorry.'

'_Someone followed you and Tony home on Wednesday and took a whole lot of photos along the way. So Pete's pressing charges against the photographer, but he needs you to sign some documents as well. Is that okay?'_

'They published a picture with Tony in it?' the Doctor asked angrily.

'_Mmhmm,' _Jackie agreed distractedly. '_We think it might have been because someone had a bone to pick with you_.'

'What?'

'"_Jane Barrow",' _Jackie replied, and he could hear the sound of pages rustling as she picked something up. '_Do you know her?_'

The Doctor frowned.

'What did she say about me? Did she say something about Rose?'

Jackie let out a snort of laughter, which only served to frustrate the Doctor.

'Jackie?' he ground out irritably.

'_She certainly didn't say anything about Rose,_' Jackie finally managed to reply, and the Doctor allowed himself to relax. '_But she had more than a few things to say about you._'

'I bet she did,' he muttered to himself, Jackie too busy reading the article aloud to hear him.

'"..._rude and dull. It's hard to see why the Vitex heiress would spend even a second in the company of this nobody." Honestly, what did you say to her?'_ Jackie asked in exasperation.

'Nothing!' the Doctor exclaimed, his voice jumping up an octave in protest.

'_Well I don't believe that,_' scoffed Jackie. '_She said you were rude. That sounds just like you.'_

'I was only rude because she tried to...to..._proposition_ me,' he stammered lamely.

There was a moment's silence and then Jackie burst out laughing.

'Thanks, Jackie,' he replied sarcastically, holding the phone away from his ear slightly to protect his sensitive hearing. 'Glad to know you're on my side.'

'_Of course I'm on _your_ side, you plum,'_ Jackie replied immediately, startling the Doctor with her sincerity. '_She sounds like a right piece of work, that woman. Fancy having a go at you whilst Rose is out of the picture. The nerve of some people.'_

The Doctor suppressed a smile. It had been a very long while since he'd had someone looking out for him. He'd forgotten how comforting it was.

'_You alright, sweetheart?'_

Jackie's concerned voice broke into his musings.

'Sorry, yes. When did you say I need to meet Pete?'

o0o

A week later the Doctor was in Oxford.

He'd always found the city university enthralling, and the opportunity to re-explore Oxford now was too tempting to pass up. London had had its fair share of differences and he expected nothing less in Oxford. He had fond memories of the college institutes that were the bread and butter of the city, not to mention Pete's universe boasted a thirty-ninth college that had never existed in his original universe.

He'd told Jackie he'd spend a day or two in the city, but now that he'd once again found himself in the Radcliffe Observatory Quarter he wasn't so sure. Two days seemed like an awfully short amount of time. And it wasn't as though he had any pressing commitments waiting for him back at the Tyler Estate. Well, apart from walking Tony home of course. But somehow he suspected Jackie would be fine with him missing this week's pick up after the fiasco with the media last Wednesday.

He'd simply wanted to get the vibe of the university again when he'd wandered into the Denys Wilkinson Building, home to Oxford's astrophysics and particle physics departments. He'd certainly had no intention of drawing attention to himself. After all, he'd had his fair share of unwanted attention in London. And he certainly hadn't planned on accidentally taking a graduate level theoretical astronomy lecture.

Apart from learning that Schrödinger's cat had in fact been Schrödinger's dog in this universe, he thought on the whole that the lecture had gone surprisingly well considering he'd deviated from the prescribed topic considerably. Although the students remained engaged listeners, as the two-hour mark passed by the Doctor began to wonder how long he was supposed to lecture for. Surely, at most, the lecture spot was a two hour block, but nobody seemed inclined to leave yet. Enthusiastic students were a rare commodity though so the Doctor supposed continuing to lecture was the least he could do for the absent lecturer who seemed to have nurtured such fierce passion for astronomy within his students.

He was about to launch into a theory of the origins of dark matter when he was interrupted.

'Alright young scholars, time to move along I should think. I'll be in all sorts of trouble if the Faculty think I've held you back late again!'

The Doctor froze as the painfully familiar voice resonated from the back corner of the classroom. Vainly he scanned the crowd for a glimpse of the man who he knew couldn't possibly be here, but the students had all stood up, blocking his view of the newcomer.

It seemed the absent Professor had snuck in unobserved.

'Prof! Prof!'

'You're back!'

'Did she have the baby?'

'Prof, you missed the lecture!'

'Are you a Grandfather now, Prof?'

The cacophony of questions exploded into the silence of the classroom as the students clamoured to greet their Professor. The Doctor paid the questions no mind though as the crowd finally parted and the lecturer stepped forward to join him by the podium.

Wilfred Mott stood before him.

For one bewildered moment the Doctor simply stared, and then he was stepping forward engulfing the man in an embrace. To his credit Wilfred accepted the gesture, albeit with great confusion.

'Steady on, lad,' the older man chuckled awkwardly, although he sounded genuinely concerned when he added quietly, 'everything alright?'

It was enough to remind the Doctor that this Wilfred Mott wasn't the Wilfred Mott he'd known. Embarrassedly he stepped away, rubbing nervously at the back of his hair. Wilfred held his gaze for a moment longer, seeming to see right through him before he returned his attention to his students.

'What's that you ask?' Wilfred quipped, feigning ignorance to his student's queries.

'Come on, Prof,' one of the students coaxed. 'You've _got _to tell us.'

Wilfred made a show of pretending to consider the young man's request.

'Alright, alright, hold your horses,' he acquiesced.

Once again Wilfred broke off, milking his audience for all its worth. The Doctor suppressed a smile, amused by the older man's antics. The Wilfred he'd known had always had a flare for the dramatic as well.

'It is my absolute pleasure,' Wilfred continued after an appropriate pause, 'to inform you all that at two minutes past nine this morning my grandson was born.'

The classroom burst into cheers with one of the students leading a hearty round of three cheers for their Professor. Others clamoured around Wilfred, offering congratulations and asking after the newborn, but the Doctor paid them no mind too caught up in berating himself for not checking sooner. For Wilfred's words had reminded him of another person, another grandchild whom had once called Wilfred "Gramps".

Was it possible that Donna existed in this universe?

Logically he knew that any Donna Noble who resided in Pete's world would not be _his_ Donna Noble, but the possibility that his best mate might be alive and well in this universe was too tempting to ignore. He'd once warned Rose against the "gingerbread house" nature of parallel universes, but did the same rules still apply once you moved universes?

'Now then, lad. I think introductions are in order, don't you?'

The Doctor was startled out of his thoughts to find himself alone with Wilfred, the students having finally dispersed to their next classes.

'Wilfred Mott,' the older man declared, offering his hand for the Doctor to shake. 'But you already knew that didn't you?'

Stepping forward the Doctor accepted the firm handshake.

'Yes,' he answered simply.

Wilfred considered him for a moment.

'You're quite well versed on all manner of topics..._Doctor_. From string theory to dark matter, you certainly know your Physics.'

The Doctor raised an eyebrow, beginning to realise that this Wilfred Mott was just as shrewd, if not more so, than his counterpart from the other universe.

'You must have arrived not long after we'd started if you heard all that.'

'Oh, I can't stand being late,' Wilfred agreed lightly. 'Drives me mad when the students are tardy. Wouldn't be fair of me to have double standards now, would it?'

The Doctor frowned.

'You let me take the lecture,' he said slowly. 'Even though you were here all along. Why?'

Wilfred grinned, and for the first time the Doctor recognised a familiar spark in the man's blue eyes.

'"The one exclusive sign of thorough knowledge is the power of teaching".'

'So said Aristotle,' the Doctor replied confusedly. 'But that doesn't explain why you let me take your class.'

Wilfred chuckled.

'Doesn't it, Doctor?'

The question was clearly meant to be rhetorical because Wilfred offered no further explanation before continuing on after a momentary pause.

'I've spent my life attempting to understand the universe, Doctor. And do you know what I've learnt?'

The Doctor frowned at the non-sequitur.

'No?'

'That the only thing I truly know for certain is that I know almost nothing about the universe,' he confessed amusedly. 'But,' he continued after a deliberate pause, 'I _do_ know that it was Schrodinger's dog. Not cat.'

Wilfred's piercing blue eyes bored into the Doctor's searchingly.

'I think you know more about the universe than I will ever know in my entire lifetime, Doctor,' he said wisely. 'Yet you said Schrodinger's dog. Why is that?'

'Oh you know how it is,' the Doctor babbled nervously. 'Cats and dogs. Always getting the two mixed up. For instance, did you know that cats only have 30 teeth whereas dogs have 42? Never been much of a cat person though, me. They make terrible nuns. Dogs are much more social beings. Can carry a conversation for hours if you want. Not to mention they can scent Arachadin tomatoes from a mile away. Or is that mud crabs...,' he trailed off, trying to recall for certain.

'Or perhaps,' Wilfred cut in dryly, 'in your universe, Doctor, Schrodinger decided to use a cat.'

'What?'

All amusement vanished from his tone, the conversation suddenly serious as he stared in surprise at Wilfred Mott.

'I didn't mention that I used to know Pete Tyler quite well, did I?' Wilfred offered calmly, unfazed by the abrupt change in tone.

'No.'

'I knew Jackie Tyler as well,' Wilfred continued easily. 'The Jackie Tyler who was born in this universe, of course,' he added matter-of-factly.

The Doctor had no idea what to say to that, simply too stunned by Wilfred's frankness. So wisely he said nothing.

'Naturally,' Wilfred continued, 'I was greatly saddened to learn of her death the night Lumic went mad in London. I spoke with Pete not long afterwards. He was devastated, despite the distance that had grown between the pair of them. So forgive me for remaining rather sceptical when Jackie and Rose Tyler arrived out of the blue two years later.

'The cover story Torchwood invented was certainly a masterpiece,' he conceded. 'The perfect amount of truth to make the lie believable to the general public. But I know Pete Tyler. We've spoken many times in the past, and the way our personal lives played out, well, we had a fair amount in common. I never believed for one moment that Rose Tyler was his daughter.'

'Rose is Pete Tyler's daughter,' the Doctor murmured.

Not only was it the truth, but he was curious to see how much Wilfred really knew.

'Oh, of that I have no doubt, Doctor,' the older man agreed. 'But she is not the Pete Tyler of _this_ universe's daughter. You see Pete and I often spoke about children. He wanted very much to have a child, but Jackie was less certain. His desire was no deception, Doctor. Until Tony arrived, Pete had never fathered a child. No matter what the Torchwood briefing says. I know that for certain because he'd even considered adoption at one stage. It's not something one considers lightly, Doctor, which is why Pete often found himself in discussion with me.

'My wife and I were unable to have any children of our own,' Wilfred explained, correctly interpreting the Doctor's confused expression. 'My career and unlucky circumstances meant we waited too long. But we both wanted desperately to have a child, so instead we adopted my wonderful daughter, Cecily. And today, she's made me the luckiest man in the universe because she's brought my grandson into the world.'

Wilfred's joy for his newborn grandson was infectious, and although the subsequent understanding that the child's birth meant neither Sylvia nor Donna existed in this universe, the Doctor found himself smiling in spite of himself.

'Congratulations, Wilfred,' he offered generously. 'I'm certain you'll make him proud.'

The older man ducked his head in embarrassment, emotions not quite under control after such a tumultuous morning. He took a few seconds to gather himself before clearing his throat and raising his gaze.

'Now then, Doctor, how long will you be in Oxford for?'

o0o

In his haste to set out and explore Oxford the Doctor had neglected to book any accommodation in the city. For a man who'd always had a TARDIS with him it hadn't even occurred to him that he'd needed to. The concept of planning where he wanted to be on a given day, weeks in advance, was an entirely foreign one. It was only when Wilfred asked where he was staying in Oxford that the Doctor realised his oversight.

Learning that he had nowhere to go, Wilfred had only been too happy to invite the Doctor into his own home after an afternoon of lively discussion. In fact, he'd refused to take no for an answer and had absolutely rebuffed any attempt to discuss monetary compensation. He was adamant that the only payment he could possibly accept was knowledge, for he'd spent a lifetime working in the fields of astronomy and astrophysics, and the temptation to discuss his theories on parallel worlds with a man who actually hailed from another universe was simply too great an opportunity for the old scholar to pass up.

Wilfred had always had notions that such parallel worlds must exist, ideas nurtured by his career and insight into the Torchwood Institute. Not to mention his acquaintance with the Tyler family had led him to question the reappearance of Jackie Tyler, and the arrival of both Rose Tyler and John Smith. After all, people simply didn't appear out of thin air he'd reasoned.

And when the stars had started disappearing, well Wilfred had known something monumental was at play.

For his part the Doctor enjoyed hearing Wilfred's theories, impressed by the astuteness of his new friend. At first, he had to admit it had been disconcerting talking with the older man. There was no denying the similarities between the Wilfred of his home universe and this new man he was just beginning to know, but the longer they spoke together the more the Doctor began to see them as individuals.

Wilfred still had his wife, Margaret, in this universe, and he was a lighter man for it. Not that Wilf hadn't been happy in the other universe, but there was something about losing a spouse that changed people. And although there was no Sylvia or Donna in this Wilfred's life, he had Cecily and his new grandson. His love for which was evident even from the short amount of time the Doctor had known him.

He wasn't the same Wilfred he'd once known, but he was a _good man_.

So when Wilfred asked to hear his story, the Doctor did not lie.

o0o

'About time you showed up.'

The Doctor cringed as the kitchen lights flicked on. He'd been attempting to sneak in through the back door of the Tyler mansion without waking the family. Clearly he'd been unsuccessful.

'Jackie!' he greeted, his voice cracking much to his dismay as he turned to face her. 'What are you doing up?'

She ignored him, arms crossing defensively over her fluffy pink dressing gown as she stared him down.

'Two days, you said. "I'll be back before you know it, Jackie",' she mimicked horribly.

The Doctor cringed, recalling his promise.

'Ahh, yes,' he faltered. 'About that. You see, Jackie –'

'Don't even bother,' she interrupted angrily. 'I don't want to hear what silly excuse you've made up for me. Six days, Doctor. Six bloody days...and you didn't even...you just...'

She broke off suddenly, whirling around and rushing out of the kitchen.

The Doctor stared after her in bewilderment, utterly confused by her behaviour. He ran a hand through his hair as he replayed the conversation in his head, trying to work out what had set her off. She'd looked upset right before she'd disappeared from the kitchen, but he had no idea why. Realising he'd clearly stuffed up, he followed after her.

He didn't have to go very far to find her. She was in the hallway outside the kitchen, sitting slumped against the wall.

She'd been crying.

'Jackie...?' he called tentatively, approaching her with all the caution one usually reserved for dangerous beasts.

She said nothing so he moved to sit next to her, hugging his knees against his chest as he sat in the semi-dark corridor with Rose's mother, content to wait her out. As expected, after several minutes of silence she finally spoke.

'You didn't even call,' she said quietly, her voice stuffy from crying. 'You could have been dead and I wouldn't even have known.'

'Me, dead?' he quipped lightly, falling back on humour. 'Nah. I wouldn't dare, Jackie Tyler.'

'Don't joke about it,' she snapped, surprising him with the seriousness of her tone. ''s'not like it can't happen. You might just disappear one day and I'd never know. I'd just be sat here waiting for you to come back.'

'Jackie,' he replied exasperatedly. 'I was in Oxford. That's all, I swear. Not even two hours up the road.'

She took a shaky breath in, turning to face him properly for the first time since he'd joined her.

'I know,' she admitted. 'But I couldn't stop worrying...first Rose...and now you...and I...I just wanted to know you were alright,' she finished softly.

'Oh.'

Rassilon, he was thick.

'I'm sorry, Jackie,' he murmured earnestly. 'I've never been very good at this sort of thing. Domestics and family, you know. In fact, I'm pretty rubbish at it to be honest. Was back on Gallifrey as well, but so was everyone else so it didn't really matter. Anyway,' he said abruptly, getting back on topic, 'I forgot to take the phone charger with me. But that's not really an excuse. Truth is I'm too used to being on my own.'

He lapsed into silence, surprised by his own honesty.

Jackie smiled softly.

'You've got Rose now,' she reminded him gently. 'Even if it doesn't seem like it at the moment.'

They both chuckled a little at that. But then Jackie was speaking again, her tone uncharacteristically vulnerable as she ploughed on determinedly.

'And you'll always have me and Pete,' she promised. 'If you want that is?'

His grin could have split the world in half.

'Jackie Tyler, I'd be honoured.'

He let the words hang in the air for a moment before jumping to his feet excitedly.

'Now, what say you to a cup of tea before bed?' he suggested, obligingly extending his hand to her. 'I've got some news I want to share with you.'

'That doesn't sound half ominous,' Jackie huffed, accepting his hand up.

The Doctor shot her an impish grin in reply, leading the way into the kitchen.

'By the way,' he added over his shoulder as he searched around for the tea leaves, 'how did you know it was me coming in down here? Could have been an axe murderer for all you knew.'

Incredulously, Jackie laughed.

'I heard your taxi come up the drive, you plum. Wasn't half loud. And who else but you would try to sneak in at half one in the morning? Honestly,' she scoffed, half in amusement, half in exasperation.

The Doctor rolled his eyes, turning back to the kettle he'd just boiled.

'What's this news of yours then?' Jackie prompted.

He paused midway through filling the teapot, the kitchen suddenly stiflingly silent.

'I've been offered a job,' he said quietly.

He couldn't quite make himself turn around to face Jackie, too nervous of what he'd find if he did. So he spilled the whole story in one nervous ramble, back resolutely straight as he stared at the contents of the teapot. It was over in a matter of minutes.

'So you're moving to Oxford then?' Jackie asked softly, breaking the silence that had followed his announcement.

'No,' he breathed, finally summoning the courage to turn back. 'Not to Oxford. Not yet at any rate. It's not even a job yet. Just an offer really. An expression of interest, I suppose. I haven't said yes to anything. Wilfred's just said he'll put me in contact with a few of his colleagues if I'm serious. And I am, I think. I liked it, Jackie,' he admitted. 'Teaching and lecturing. It's a chance to do something constructive. Something meaningful,' he finished earnestly.

When he finally raised his gaze to meet Jackie's, he found her smiling fondly at him.

'Best to sleep on it,' she advised sagely, reaching forward to give his arm a slight squeeze. 'Goodnight, Doctor.'

He watched her disappear off back upstairs before deciding that just this once he'd heed Jackie Tyler's advice.


	4. October

**Chapter 4 - October**

Several days had passed since Wilfred's unexpected job offer, yet the Doctor remained undecided. He'd done as Jackie had suggested and slept on the idea, but to no avail. He couldn't disregard the notion that he was overlooking something. Some significant variable that refused to be ignored, that _needed_ to be factored into his decision. But for the life of him he could not pinpoint what it was.

He was missing the bigger picture, and he knew it.

Briefly he wondered if this new found short-sightedness had something to do with Donna, but he dismissed the idea almost as quickly as it had formed. If he was being honest with himself, he'd always had a propensity to miss the obvious. He still remembered how silly he'd felt when he'd failed to notice the London Eye in front of Rose. In his defence he _had_ had an awful lot to keep track of in his mind at the time, but it was a reminder that sometimes he _did_ miss the obvious.

Although this time, he wasn't sure it _was_ so obvious.

At first he'd thought the nagging sense of unease had been because of Rose's absence. It didn't seem right that he should make such a momentous decision without her. But he'd realised that wasn't the case at all.

Although he'd have loved her input – she always seemed to know just the right thing to say to help him through a difficult decision – he knew he was perfectly capable of making _this_ decision _without her_. In fact, he suspected it was _important_ that he make this decision on his own. He'd been plagued by self-doubt since he'd arrived in Pete's universe, but he knew if he could do this by himself, then he could do anything. After all, one didn't get much more domestic than picking a career to pursue for one's lifetime.

Rose wasn't the answer this time, but it was frustrating to think that she'd probably be able to tell him exactly what he'd overlooked in a heartbeat.

Distractedly, he ran a hand through his untamed hair and glanced towards his desk. Tinkering had always helped him focus his mind in the past, perhaps now it would help him order his thoughts and make a decision. Pulling out his desk chair he contemplated the dozens of half completed projects that littered the surface of his desk. He had a terrible habit of getting distracted and leaving things half done, he realised wryly.

Picking up the closest object he fiddled with it idly. It was a small cube, the sides an opaque grey colouring, and roughly the size of a tennis ball. One of the six sides had been removed, revealing the complex network of wires and circuitry he'd been working on. The device, a holographic interface that he planned to upload pictures onto, was for Tony. Essentially, it was a virtual photo album for the boy, with one added bonus: it was based on an old Gallifreyan design. The pictures would be three-dimensional.

He'd stopped working on it several weeks ago. It'd been late at night at the time and the circuitry had been playing up. No matter how intently he'd scrutinised the connections he hadn't been able to work out where he'd gone wrong. After all, it had been a very long time since he'd last built a photo cube for someone. Putting his mistake down to forgetfulness and fatigue, he'd set the project aside for another day.

Casting a glance into the exposed circuitry now, he immediately spotted the mistake he'd previously missed. It was a rudimentary error, and one that would take seconds to correct. Swapping around the incorrectly positioned wires he located the sixth side of the cube and slotted it back into place to complete the device. A quick buzz with his sonic to tighten the connections, and the photo cube would be finished. His blue jacket was hanging on the back of his chair, so he reached blindly behind him and into the inner pocket, expecting to find his screwdriver.

But he hadn't worn the jacket in over a week.

Instead his questing fingers brushed against something warm and familiar, and he felt his breath leave him in surprise. Without further thought he tightened his grip on the object and withdrew it from his pocket.

For several long minutes he simply stared at the object in his hands, unable to believe that _this_ was what he'd forgotten.

Ever so slowly he leant forwards, resting his forehead against the lump of TARDIS coral, allowing himself to lose himself in her presence. She was the last piece of Gallifrey that belonged to him. His lifelong companion.

And he'd neglected her.

Circumstances had forced his hand in a way. He'd been distracted adjusting to life in Pete's world, a period of time complicated by attempting to cope with Rose's disappearance and relearning who he was. He hadn't forgotten the TARDIS, but he certainly hadn't prioritised her. As he reached out to her, reuniting and rejoicing in her presence once again, he made himself a promise: never again would he take her presence for granted.

He'd made his decision.

o0o

'You only had to ask, you know.'

The Doctor startled guiltily as Pete's voice sounded from the doorway.

Once he'd decided to accept Wilfred's job offer he'd gone straight to Pete's study. Rose's father had still been at work and Jackie had been downstairs supervising Tony's homework, so he'd had no qualms about sneaking into the man's study. After all, the room held the only computer that was linked to Torchwood's servers, and it was access to those servers that he'd required. He hadn't intended to be caught red-handed though.

Swivelling the desk chair around, the Doctor found himself face to face with Pete Tyler.

'I didn't think you'd be home so soon,' he said lamely.

It was just his luck that the one time he'd decided to break into Pete's office coincided with the day Pete decided to leave work early.

Pete chuckled.

'I may have received a tip off to head home early,' he admitted, closing his office door behind him.

The Doctor frowned, eyeing Pete speculatively as the other man moved to sit on the couch by the office window.

'I've heard enough stories about you over the years now, Doctor, to not be in the least bit surprised to have found you breaking into my home office. So I had Tosh set up a few extra security measures when you came back,' he explained. 'Figured I probably wouldn't be able to stop you, but I'd at least know about it when it happened.'

The Doctor had the good grace to look at least somewhat chastened. Although mostly because he'd been caught out as opposed to feeling any true guilt over hacking Torchwood's servers.

'In fact,' Pete continued, 'I expected you to try weeks ago. So the question is: do I need to be worried?'

The Doctor blinked.

'Worried?' he echoed, nonplussed.

Now Pete looked confused.

'I assumed, given your dislike for Torchwood, that only an emergency would lead you to access our resources,' he said slowly. 'Clearly, I was wrong.'

The Doctor ran a hand nervously through his hair.

'Well,' he began, dragging the word out, 'you're not entirely wrong, Pete. It _is_ an emergency. Of sorts. _Technically_. Although probably more of a "personal" emergency rather than a "world ending" one,' he finished helpfully.

Pete let out a weary sigh in defeat, loosening his tie as he did so.

'Go on then. What's this emergency of yours, Doctor?'

Turning the desktop screen towards Pete, he brought up the program he'd been perusing before Pete had found him.

'I'm looking for somewhere to grow the TARDIS.'

Pete studied the screen silently, his brow furrowing the longer he read.

'That's all of our data on rift activity within the Republic from the past century.'

'Yep,' he agreed, leaning forwards to pull up a different image.

'Now you've extrapolated the data to create a geographical representation of rift activity across the Republic,' Pete observed, eying the map of Britain curiously.

'Yep.'

With one final click the Doctor brought up the image he'd been in the process of examining when he'd been interrupted.

'Same data,' Pete said quietly, 'but now you've added the universities Wilfred suggested...'

He trailed off, turning his gaze onto the Doctor.

'You've accepted.'

The Doctor nodded.

'I have,' he answered seriously, oddly nervous of Pete's reaction.

The man took a moment to process the words, his expression eerily blank, but then he smiled.

'Well, I'll be sorry to see you go, Doctor,' he said genuinely. 'You'll be sorely missed around here.'

'Thank you.'

'There is one thing though, that for the life of me I can't understand,' Pete added. 'Why on Earth are you looking for the university with the most rift activity around it?'

The Doctor laughed.

'Well, I can't very well grow my TARDIS without access to the rift now, can I?'

Pete groaned, dropping his head into his hands, much to the Doctor's amusement. He thought he had a pretty good idea about what was going through the other man's mind.

'Don't worry, Pete,' he said earnestly. 'I promise I won't stir up any trouble with the rift.'

He paused.

'Well, not deliberately,' he added.

Pete scoffed.

'Well, definitely not without a very good reason,' he amended.

For some reason this didn't seem to reassure Pete at all.

'I'm going to have to open a second branch of Torchwood, aren't I?'

o0o

To celebrate his forthcoming employment, Jackie had insisted on hosting a small dinner party to mark the occasion. After all, it wasn't everyday that her alien not quite son-in-law found himself gainful employment. Plus she'd been desperate for an excuse to meet Wilfred from the moment she'd learnt he'd made a friend in Pete's universe.

Wilfred and Margaret arrived at the Tyler Mansion on Friday evening, having made the trek into London once classes had finished for the day. They planned to visit a few of Wilfred's London-based colleagues the next morning so Jackie had offered them rooms at the mansion for the evening, which the pair had gratefully accepted.

The Doctor had met the pair enthusiastically at the door, taking great pride in introducing them to the Tyler family. Tony, wearing his Arsenal jersey proudly despite his mother's insistence that he put on a set of good clothes for their visitors, had been delighted to learn that Wilfred was an Arsenal fan. The brief discussion of the football club that ensued, earned Wilfred a spot in Tony's good books for life. Having satisfied his curiosity, Tony had then disappeared upstairs to play with his toys until dinner time, leaving the adults free to talk.

Wilfred and Pete had needed no introductions, falling easily into conversation as old friends were wont to do. The Doctor had lingered by Jackie and Margaret, fervently hoping that the pair of them would get on. He needn't have worried in the slightest. By the time they sat down for dinner Jackie had shared half a dozen embarrassing stories about him with Margaret, much to his horror.

The meal had passed in a blur of good conversation and better company, and for the most part he'd slipped easily between the conversations, delighted to be surrounded by his surrogate families. Twice he'd lapsed into unnatural silence, reminded of who was missing at the table.

_Everyone except Rose_.

He'd felt her absence keenly throughout the night, but for the most part he'd kept on top of it by reminding himself that he believed in her. She _would_ come home. Plus Tony had a knack for drawing him back into conversation.

As the evening drew to its natural close, Wilfred joined him by the fireplace. They'd moved from the dining room into the living room for drinks once the meal had finished, and now they were alone. Jackie had long ago taken Tony up to bed and Margaret had followed not long after, wanting an early night. At some point Pete had disappeared into the kitchen to get a head start on the washing up, perhaps sensing that Wilfred wanted to talk shop.

'Have you decided then, lad?'

The Doctor broke his gaze away from the mesmerising flames to face Wilfred.

'Exeter,' he said quietly. 'I'd like to work there.'

Wilfred grinned.

'I'd hoped you might pick there,' he said cheerfully. 'Charles has been driving me mad for the past week because he hasn't been able to find anyone to fill the position. Not only is Professor Hurley retiring now, but one of their younger staff members is taking maternity leave. Poor fellow has been at his wit's end trying to manage the Physics department.'

'Well, I'm glad I'll be of use,' the Doctor laughed.

'Exeter will be proud to have you, lad,' Wilfred agreed, pausing to take a sip of his whiskey tumbler. 'I'll contact Charles in the morning. But be warned, Doctor. He'll probably want you to start on Monday. Would that be possible?'

'That should be fine.'

It would mean he'd have to sort out his living arrangements more quickly than he'd anticipated, but he knew the sooner he could start, the happier the university would be. After all, classes had already been running for a month and a half now, and he knew that the students would be starting to worry about their upcoming midterm assessments. If he was going to be entrusted with a class for an entire year he wanted as much time as he could to build rapport with them. He'd seen the interest and excitement Wilfred had nurtured in his pupils, and he wanted that as well.

'I think I might call it a night,' Wilfred announced, interrupting his musings. The older man finished his whiskey with a flourish and stood, clapping the Doctor on the back as he moved to leave the room.

'It's been an absolute pleasure, Doctor, but I'm afraid I don't quite have the same stamina for late nights anymore.'

He winked conspiratorially as he made his way out of the living room.

'Do you think I should have waited for Rose to come home?'

The question slipped out before the Doctor could think about it, falling clumsily into the silence of the room as it caught Wilfred short of the door. The older man did not turn, and the Doctor cursed his unchecked gob. After all, Wilfred had never met Rose. What could he possibly know about the situation? He felt like an idiot because he knew instinctively that this was not a question for his guest. Before he could retract the question though, Wilfred turned around.

'Do _you_ think you should have waited for her, lad?'

The Doctor blinked in surprise as Wilfred turned the question around on him. Nevertheless the answer came instantly.

'No.'

The older man smiled wistfully.

'There you have it then,' he said simply.

He shrugged and made to leave again. But once again he stopped short of the door, turning back suddenly to face the Doctor.

'Far be it for me to comment on your relationship with Ms Tyler,' he said earnestly, albeit half apologetically. 'But I do know one thing, Doctor. If she loves you_,_ even a tenth as much as you love her, then _your_ happiness will be _her_ happiness.'

Having said his piece, Wilfred touched his knuckle to his forehead in a gesture of goodwill and left the Doctor alone with his thoughts. It was a long time before the Doctor followed in his friend's footsteps and retired to bed.

o0o

'Oh, now that's hideous!'

For the second time in as many days the Doctor started as he was caught unawares in Pete's office. Although he'd gained permission from Pete this time, he hadn't intended for Jackie to find him midway through his reconnaissance of the local real estate in Exeter.

'Hello, Jackie,' he greeted sarcastically, adding under his breath, 'what are the chances?'

'I heard that,' she said pointedly, pulling the spare chair out from the corner.

As she busied herself with the chair he subtly angled the computer screen away from her, hoping to discourage her curiosity.

'Of course you did,' he muttered as she gestured for him to move over so she could place her chair next to him. 'Is there something I can do for you?'

Having positioned herself, she deftly straightened out the computer screen.

'You aren't seriously thinking of buying this place are you?' she said idly, as though he'd asked her opinion of the property. 'The owner must have been colour blind to have picked that colour scheme!'

'Jackie –'

He was cut off as she leant over to commandeer the mouse from him, pulling up the next property listing without so much as a by your leave.

'That bathroom is awful,' she declared, the mouse clicking loudly in the silence as she flicked through the list of properties he'd pulled up. 'Is that the master bedroom? You wouldn't fit a single bed in there, let alone a double.'

_Click_.

'Rose won't like this one.'

_Click._

'_You_ won't like this one.'

_Click._

'Hmm. This one's alright, but too small. You'll want at least three spare bedrooms.'

_Click._

'Jackie –,' he tried again, but once again she ignored him.

'Did you put any filters into this search?'

The Doctor opened his mouth, then shut it promptly as he realised he _hadn't_ specified any filters.

'That's _completely_ beside the point,' he countered irritably, but Jackie was not to be deterred. She continued to click through the listings with an ease that astonished him, and he wondered why he hadn't simply asked for her help in the first place. He'd already wasted an hour on the website, and since Wilfred had called earlier that morning to confirm that Exeter wanted him to start on Monday he really couldn't afford to spend all day looking for a house.

The only reason he hadn't asked for her input immediately was because he was worried she'd be angry with him. She'd seemed happy for him when she'd learnt of his job offer, but he still remembered how upset she'd been when he'd stayed those extra few days in Oxford without telling her. How would she take the news that he was moving away to Exeter? He'd often been accused of being oblivious to human feelings in the past, but not this time. He still remembered her tears.

'Are you angry with me?'

The thought escaped without his permission, surprising him as much as Jackie. She stopped clicking and looked at him, genuinely shocked.

'Why would I be angry with you?'

He shrugged uselessly, only perplexing Jackie further.

'Apart from the bit where you forgot to mention you were buying a house, why would I be angry, Doctor?'

He frowned. Her words didn't match her tone. She sounded honestly curious.

'So, you are angry?' he asked hesitantly, needing to clarify because this was definitely dangerous territory for him. He could sense a Tyler slap lurking nearby.

Jackie rolled her eyes.

'To be fair, I hardly think you know the first thing about buying a house,' she said pragmatically. 'Why didn't you ask me for help?'

Bewildered, he simply gaped at her, entirely lost to the conversation. She sighed, and finally decided to let him off the hook.

'I'm not angry that you're leaving, Doctor. If that's what you're asking.'

'You're not?'

He couldn't quite keep the disbelief out of his voice.

Jackie laughed.

'Oh, I'll certainly miss you, you idiot,' she said affectionately. 'But I'm not angry.'

She paused momentarily, her gaze seeking out his own.

'Everyone leaves home in the end.'

Her words, wistful and tinged with the smallest hint of resignation, were met with silence.

'Rose told me that once,' he said eventually, his voice cracking slightly as he remembered that day. 'We were trapped...for a bit...thought I'd lost my TARDIS,' he added jokingly.

Jackie's brow furrowed slightly.

'I hadn't,' he continued hastily. 'Obviously. Brought her home again. Safe and sound.'

He smiled broadly, hoping to bluster his way through having to explain the whole planet-orbiting-a-black-hole thing. He needn't have worried though because Jackie only had one thing to say.

'You brought her home though,' she said softly. 'Like you've always promised.'

The change of tone caught him off guard, and he shifted uncomfortably beneath Jackie's probing gaze.

'Yeah,' he finally agreed, although he didn't sound in the least bit certain.

'Don't you go doubting yourself now, mister,' Jackie said knowingly. 'You won't catch me saying this again, but I'm so glad Rose met you. I might have had my doubts about you,' she admitted. 'And the whole "alien" thing is a bit weird –'

'Oi!'

'Ok,' she acquiesced. 'But the hand thing is a bit –'

'OI!' he interrupted again.

'Oh, I'm only teasing,' Jackie huffed, eyes alight with amusement.

He rolled his eyes, allowing her her brief moment of triumph. Eventually she sobered, her gaze turning serious once again.

'Truth is,' she said earnestly, 'if there was one person I had to entrust with the life of my daughter, it would be _you_.'

The Doctor could count on one hand the number of times he'd been rendered truly speechless. And the last time had been several regenerations ago.

He knew there was only really one thing he could say in response.

'Thank you, Jackie Tyler.'

She smiled, her cheeks tinged pink in embarrassment. Leaning forward she reclaimed the mouse, waking the computer which had gone to sleep whilst they'd been talking.

'Let's find you a home, shall we?'

o0o

'Can this be my room, Doctor?'

The Doctor laughed as Tony grabbed his hand and pulled him excitedly into the room he'd selected. It was the smallest bedroom of the ones he'd been offered, but it had a spectacular view.

'Oh yes, Tony Tyler!' he agreed immediately, hoisting the boy over his shoulder.

Tony giggled delightedly as he carried him back downstairs to join his parents in the kitchen. As much as he enjoyed seeing Tony excited he didn't want him running around upstairs by himself, not yet at least.

With Jackie's help the Doctor had found a home that he was beginning to suspect he'd grow to love almost as much as his TARDIS. The moment he'd seen the listing he'd known it was the right place for him, and with Pete's help, he'd virtually owned the house within hours of selecting it. Somehow the Vitex billionaire had managed to rush the paperwork through for him, as well as insisting on using his own money to purchase the property, much to the Doctor's horror. Pete had absolutely refused to accept any form of compensation though, instructing him to consider it as a "thank you" gift for all the times he'd saved the universe.

The only reason the Doctor hadn't insisted on paying the man back was because Jackie had very sensibly pointed out that the house was going to need a lot of work to make it habitable. When he'd continued to argue over that point she'd told him quite succinctly that if he still felt the same way _after_ he'd paid for all the repairs she'd happily let him pay Pete back every cent. But until then he wasn't to say another thing about it.

Wisely, he'd held his tongue.

Seeing the property now, he was beginning to suspect that Jackie might have been right. There was currently no hot water and he suspected he was going to have to rewire a significant number of fuses. Still, he wouldn't have settled for anything else.

Although they'd searched extensively through the Exeter real estate listings, none of the houses had appealed to him. He'd never really thought of himself as a "picky buyer" before, but it seemed to be a new trait to this regeneration.

There had been one listing he'd briefly considered in Exeter, but Jackie had vetoed the option almost immediately. In return for her assistance she'd insisted on a four bedroom house at minimum. It wasn't so much the idea of the extra space that had bothered him; rather he couldn't see the point of having four rooms in the house exclusively set aside for sleeping. It seemed illogical, but Jackie had been non-negotiable on the point. She'd rolled her eyes and told him quite pointedly that he'd thank her later – whatever _that_ meant – before promptly adjusting the search filters accordingly.

Admittedly the option he'd been considering had been an apartment. An entirely impractical idea considering he wanted to grow his TARDIS, something that would necessitate both space and privacy.

Unable to reach a decision on the listings provided, Jackie had suggested looking outside of Exeter. After all, there was no reason he couldn't commute into work every day.

So they'd considered Exmouth, a small town to the South-East of Exeter.

And here they were.

All three Tylers had made the journey down to Exmouth with him, excited to see the new house with him, despite its state of disrepair. It was a seaside cottage, hidden away on the outskirts of the town with ten acres of land separating it from any nosy neighbours. Much to Jackie's delight it also had five bedrooms. Hardly knowing what to do with them, the Doctor had identified the master bedroom and had then instructed Tony to pick out a room for himself. If he was going to have four guest bedrooms, he might as well do something with them.

'How'd you go then?' Jackie asked as he re-entered the kitchen, Tony still draped over his shoulder.

'Oh, I think we did alright, didn't we, Tony?' he said as he made a show of putting the giggling boy down.

'Yep!'

Tony took great delight in popping the "p", much to the Doctor's amusement. It was a habit Rose's brother had apparently picked up since he'd started living with the Tylers.

'Well, which one did you pick?' Jackie asked, pulling the boy in for a cuddle.

Tony squirmed as his mother's cuddle turned into a tickling-fest.

'Mum!' he squealed in delight. 'Mum! Stop! Stop! The blue one,' he shrieked hysterically. 'I picked the blue room!'

Jackie laughed, relinquishing her grip on her son.

'And what do you say to the Doctor, young man?' she instructed pointedly.

Tony turned to face the Doctor, smiling broadly.

'Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!' he chanted excitedly.

'You're very welcome, Tony Tyler.'

'Can I really come and stay with you when Rose comes back?'

It was the sixth time Tony had asked the question, but he smiled good-naturedly.

'Of course you can,' he promised. 'You've got a room here now, don't you? You'll have to sleep in it some time!'

Tony turned expectantly towards his mother.

'Please can I stay with the Doctor tonight, Mum? Please!?' he begged, dragging the word out into the whine that only five year olds could perfect.

He'd been asking non-stop since they'd arrived, but the Doctor knew Jackie was not going to change her mind.

'Last warning, Tony,' she said sternly. 'You know very well that you have school tomorrow, mister. And even if you didn't, the Doctor has a big day tomorrow. First day at his new job, isn't it? He'll need a good night's rest. Just like you did before your first day of school, remember?'

Tony had been so excited about starting at school that he'd worn himself out by half-five in the evening the night before, to Jackie and Pete's great amusement. Of course, he'd then woken at half-three in the morning the next day, much to their dismay.

'But, Mum,' Tony sulked, pouting.

Jackie shot him a look, and wisely Tony conceded defeat. He'd learnt early on that arguing with his mother never ended well for him. Turning his back on his mother, he stormed over to her bag, pulled out his toy cars and promptly ignored them both. Sensing that the dispute was over, the Doctor pulled up a seat at the table with Jackie. The thick oak table was one of the few items of furniture that had come with the house. Thankfully, Pete had organised for the delivery of a few more essential items of furniture the next day, but for now the Doctor owned a mattress, a kitchen table, four chairs, and a refrigerator.

'Where's Pete?' he asked curiously, for the first time noticing the other man's absence.

Jackie, who seemed greatly amused by her son's sulking, turned her attention back to him.

'Oh, he's gone to get some takeout for dinner. I thought we'd eat early, and then we'll be out of your hair so you can finish unpacking and get settled in before the big day tomorrow.'

'It's only the first day of work, Jackie,' he said exasperatedly, tugging on his ear. 'Nothing to get excited over.'

Jackie smiled knowingly, her gaze softening.

'There's no shame in feeling a little nervous, you know,' she said. 'Everybody gets nervous before their first day.'

'I'm not nervous,' he rebutted immediately, although his voice cracked traitorously.

Jackie raised an eyebrow.

'I'm not,' he insisted.

Rolling her eyes, Jackie simply shook her head in resignation.

'Of course you're not,' she agreed dryly.

'Exactly,' he said with finality, certain that she'd drop the topic.

'It is a big day though,' she said instead.

'_Jackie_,' he groaned in warning.

'But it is!' she insisted. 'You've a new house, _and_ a new job.'

He eyed her suspiciously, uncertain where she was taking the conversation.

'I suppose,' he agreed objectively.

'Well, it's not every day you do that, is it?'

'Thankfully, no,' he bit out sarcastically.

Finally she seemed to sense that he wasn't interested in pursuing the topic further.

They lapsed into an awkward silence.

'Oh, I almost forgot,' she said suddenly. 'I was going to save it for Christmas, but with the way your heating seems to come and go here, probably best you have it now. And it was supposed to be a sort of "congratulations" gift. A house-warming gift, if you'll still have it?'

He hated that she sounded so uncertain, as though she really thought she'd offended him with her funny little human tendency to mark completely unimportant occasions. To him there was no difference between tonight, or the next night, or the next. What did it matter if tonight was the "first" night in his new home? It was just a house: a building to sleep in at night, and a place to grow his TARDIS in peace. Nothing more, nothing less.

He almost believed himself too.

She must have seen the indecision on his face because she turned to Tony, taking his silence as acquiescence to her request.

'Tony, will you get the Doctor's present out of my bag?'

Excitement seemed to render Tony partially amnesiac, for he forgot to be angry with his mother as he hurried to fetch the gift.

'It's from me, as well,' he said proudly, offering the Doctor the oddly proportioned package. 'Mum let me wrap it for you!'

Not knowing what else to do, he accepted the gift from Tony, forcing out a smile that he hoped looked at least half-way real.

'You didn't have to get me a present, Jackie,' he muttered, carefully peeling off the layers of sticky tape. He suspected Tony might have used the entire role of tape.

'Wouldn't be right not to mark the occasion, Doctor,' she replied softly, obviously wary of his reaction now. 'It's only a small thing. I'd have bought you one anyway, now that it's getting cooler. Can't have you freezing on your way to work, can I?'

He stared at the navy blue and charcoal grey earflap beanie that was lying in his lap. It was such an innocuous object, practical even. But he couldn't stop staring at it. Couldn't stop seeing it for what it represented.

'I...ah...thank you, Jackie,' he managed to get out, realising belatedly that he'd been silent for far too long. Tony was staring at him crestfallen, and the Doctor hurried to remedy his mistake.

'And you, Tony,' he added hurriedly, his words tumbling together in his haste to get them out. 'Thank you. I've never opened such a well wrapped gift before. People never use the right amount of sticky tape, you know. But you did, Tony. The perfect amount, I should think.'

He stopped abruptly as he realised he was rambling. The beanie was still sitting on his lap. He stared at it. This house-warming gift that _shouldn't_ mean a thing to him, but was instead slowly and steadily breaking down every carefully constructed wall he'd built around his heart since Rose had left. And he only had the one now; one single, fragile human heart that he _couldn't_ afford to break.

He stood, pushing away from the table and letting the beanie fall to the ground as his hand migrated to the back of his neck.

'There was something...,' he began lamely, searching for an excuse. 'I need to...I...'

The words died away and before he could even think about it he was striding out the front door of his cottage. He could hear Tony calling after him, but he kept walking. And then without further thought he was running. He had no idea where he was going or why he was running away. He just needed to run.

So he did.

o0o

Jackie found him twenty minutes later.

He hadn't gone very far, only down to the beach in the end. Far enough to put some distance between the cottage and himself, but not so far that he couldn't be found.

_That_ was out of character. He didn't normally let people catch up with him again when he ran. It kind of defeated the purpose of running away in the first place, he thought sardonically.

He sensed her sit down next to him, feeling rather than seeing, as his gaze remained fixed on the symbols he was carving idly into the sand. She was within reach, but not too close. Giving him the space he needed.

He couldn't say how long she sat with him in silence. Long enough that the sun was beginning to set by the time he finally spoke.

'I've never owned a house before,' he said softly, watching the small waves as they beached themselves tirelessly against the sand. 'Well, not something that would fit your human concept of a house,' he amended. 'Nine hundred years, and not one house. Can you believe it?'

'Yes,' she said simply.

'I've done the wife and children part before though, you know,' he continued, as though she hadn't said anything. 'Did Rose ever tell you that?'

For the first time since Jackie had arrived he looked towards her, genuinely curious.

Jackie shook her head.

'I wondered,' she said quietly. 'But she never said, and I never asked.'

He laughed; a weak, half hearted sound that contained no mirth.

'No, you didn't,' he conceded. 'But I don't think you needed to, did you? There's something about being a parent that leaves a mark on you, changes you irrevocably. I can see it in you, Jackie, and you saw it in me. Even back then,' he guessed, referencing his earlier self, 'when I was a different man.'

She nodded wordlessly, and he grinned half-heartedly, pleased to know that he'd been right.

'I was a terrible parent,' he admitted abruptly. 'Wasn't much of a grandfather either. I don't think Susan ever forgave me for Alex's death,' he added softly, talking more to himself now than Jackie.

He lapsed into silence then, remembering that terrible day.

He'd failed his great-grandson. He hadn't been able to save him that day. Nor Lucie. But he'd failed Susan too. He'd left her alone, too afraid of his own grief to recognise hers.

It was one of his greatest regrets. And something he feared he could never atone for.

He had no idea how long Jackie allowed him to sit in silence, but eventually she spoke, forcing him to return to the present. The past was the past after all, and nothing he could do would ever change that. He could only remember them now.

'What's upset you, Doctor?' she asked gently, her tone filled with worry.

It was such a simple question. Yet she had no idea how complex the answer could be for him.

'Was it something I said?' she continued, his silence fuelling her anxiety until she was listing every conceivable option. 'Was it the beanie? Is it the house? Are you nervous about tomorrow? Is it –'

He knew from experience that she wouldn't stop until forced to do so. But he _needed_ her to stop. He stood suddenly, striding away until he stood several paces from her. He was breathing heavily, his hand tangled somewhere in his hair, and ankle deep in salt water because he hadn't realised he'd reached the water. He looked out at the endless ocean, and he shrugged.

'I bought a house, Jackie!' he shouted in frustration. He sounded hysterical, but there was something cathartic about shouting at the ocean, so he let it all out. Everything that had been eating away at him since he'd arrived that morning.

'A _stupid_ building, that's not in the least bit important because it doesn't mean anything to me. It _shouldn't _mean anything to me. A new job? A new house? When have I _ever_ wanted anything like that before? I _shouldn't_ want them. I'm not that man. I don't do domestics. I've _never_ wanted to before. It _shouldn't_ matter to me,' he trailed off pathetically, the words dying on his lips because he'd finally admitted to himself what was truly bothering him.

He turned around.

'I bought a house, Jackie,' he admitted, his voice cracking. 'And Rose wasn't part of that.'

'Oh, Doctor.'

Jackie closed the distance between them, pulling him into a tight hug. He couldn't say how long they stood like that. It may have been minutes, but just as easily it could have been hours. It was long enough that he could taste salt on his cheeks, though he couldn't say for certain that it was solely from the sea spray.

'I feel like I'm leaving her behind, Jackie,' he admitted quietly once they'd separated. 'I thought if I ever did anything like this, it would be with Rose by my side. But she isn't, and it doesn't feel right. I don't know what I'm doing.'

He broke off. And then he did something he'd never thought he'd willingly do.

He asked Jackie Tyler for advice.

'What do I do?'

Jackie smiled.

'You do what you've always done,' she instructed seriously. 'Stick with it, like the stubborn man I know you are.'

He laughed weakly.

'It gets easier, Doctor,' she promised. 'Step by step, day by day, it becomes less daunting. You'll get there in the end. Trust me.'

Eventually he nodded. Satisfied, Jackie reached up to wipe the last of the salt from his face.

'Come on,' she said. 'Let's go home.'

o0o

Jackie had been right, the Doctor thought as he sat down in his new armchair by the fireplace. He'd been living in Exmouth for a fortnight now; his days spent teaching at the University and his weekends in the cottage, steadily fixing the place up.

He'd never felt more alive.

He'd planted the TARDIS in the back garden his very first night, half a foot deep in soil rich with rift energy. She loved the location, the faint presence in the back of his mind only strengthened by the salt of the sea air. Now a small sapling stood proudly in place, growing stronger by the day, and he knew it wouldn't be long before she really took off.

In quiet moments, he'd catch himself worrying about what Rose would think when she came home, wondering if she'd be mad that he'd moved on with his life whilst she'd be gone. But those times were growing few and far between.

He was happy here.

Strangely, the slow path didn't seem quite so frightening anymore.


End file.
